50 Hits Of Acid: The Whole Crazy Affair
I ran a six part story about my experience with 50 hits of acid on my highdeas account, now you good people on HE get to experience the whole thing.
So I was on my way home from this new record store that I wanted to check out, when I saw some cop beating a hippie in an alley. So I go up to him and bribe him 30 bucks so he would leave the poor dude alone. I help the dude up and he is obliviously high out of his mind. He goes to me “Hey man, want to trip tonight? Open your mouth and close your eyes”, so me being a dumbass, did just that. He took out an eye dropper and squirted the whole entire thing into my mouth, it must have held at least 50 or even 60 hits. I think to myself “Oh my fucking god, I need to get home, across the city”.
You know how acid kicks in after about an hour? This kicked in around 20 minuets. I was on the bus when it started to hit. Everything was swirling around me and I felt like the bus was underwater. So I miss my stop, by the time I’m off I have what would normally be a ten minuet walk home. But after the 45 minuet underwater bus ride. I’m on a different planet. The cracks in the side walk are beginning to act like snakes, street lights are bending and changing colors. Cars look like cartoons with faces and giant wheels, my thumbs are exploding in different colors. I feel like I’m peaking on normal acid two hours into the trip, and I’m just getting started. Houses started walking down the street. I saw parade going down the street of fantastical creatures and otherworldly beings. There’s a long stair case that I need to go down to get to my house, its very steep and winding, it looked like an entrance to the netherworld. I could see my house from the street, it was glowing with fluffy clouds above it. I went down the stair case slowly, but I began to pick up speed for no reason, so I’m running down this stair case at what seems like light speed, the stairs turn into beams of rainbow and I’m running down surrounded by impossible shapes made of love. I reach the bottom of the stair case. There’s a bridge I need to cross that goes over a river, it had been raining that week so it was waay higher than usual, like me. As I cross it I look down, the river is changing into deep shades of purple and green. I see my first car come out, its headlights on, it drives up the bank and starts beeping at me, it wanted revenge for me crashing it when I was 19. It wanted blood. It was chasing me down my street, my house was about a block away. I needed to get there. The trees were growing faces and yelling at me, everything was yelling at me, the sidewalk was crumbling and falling in front of me, I had to hop from crack to crack like an adventure movie. My car was honking and the world was yelling at me. I run up my steps into my house and close the door behind me, silence.
I closed the door of my house behind me, the noise stopped. My house was dark, none of the lights were on but it seemed like a different type of dark. It felt like my soul was being sucked away by the dark. I fumbled for the light switch, it was bouncing around the wall, when I flicked it I realized it wasn’t working becuase I turned off the fuse box in the basement earlier becuase I didn’t want to bother turning off all the lights in my house.
I heard a noise, a moan, I thought to myself “Oh shit, my house is haunted”, as I walked into my living room, everything started breaking and morphing, like the house was alive, the walls were breathing so hard they were breaking and creaking. I went into my bathroom in the dark, I looked in the mirror, big mistake, I saw ghostly apparitions behind me, they were woman, with long flowing black hair, their mouths were awkwardly open, like their jaws were broken, their eyes were white, and they were screaming. I grabbed a toilet paper roll, ready to throw it at them, but they were gone. For some reason I opened the shower curtain, I saw a naked man with the head of a cockroach, I ran out of my bathroom, still clenching the toilet paper.
I needed to get into the basement before I peaked. I took out my lighter, and set the roll of toilette paper on fire, using it as a torch. This was not my basement, it was a graveyard, I was in another world, I saw the full moon, the mist, I began walking to a floating fuse box, when a baby dolls hand shot out from under a grave, then other dolls began coming out of the graves. Their heads were spinning as called out at me. More came out from the ground below my feet dragging me down into the dirt, then black, my toilette paper roll was extinguished, then I felt the carpet floor, as I stood up my head hit the fuse box, I awkwardly stumbled for the switch when, power was restored, it burned my eyes so bad but I loved it. I went back up stairs, which looked like piano keys.
In my kitchen was the sun, right over my island, along with a fox that was running around. I felt better about my trip, I went to my radio and started up the yellow submarine CD that was in it. I went to my fridge, I wanted to eat ice, for what ever reason. As I opened my freezer I saw many different foods scramble back into their boxes, like I had interrupted a party that they weren’t supposed to be having. I looked at the ice, grabbed a piece, and chomped on it. Then, it started snowing in my kitchen. It was cold so I spit the ice onto the floor, and I walked into my living room, my couch was polka-dotted (its plain leather in real life) rapidly changing colors, my carpet was growing like grass and being mowed by a cat with a purple head who had to keep walking around becuase of the constant growth of the grass. I turned on the tv but I didn’t pay attention to it. I stared at a wall, there must have been 30 different types of clocks on it, but they didn’t have any numbers on any of them.
There was a gold cuckoo clock that was insanely detailed and amazing, I loved it, it started to ring, and a bird popped out, what happened next is hard to explain, but I’ll do my best. You know how a train looks small then becomes big as it comes toward you? We’ll this is what the cuckoo bird that came out of the clock did to me, it popped out and was coming to me, then it was bigger than me, I flew in through its eye, I was in a cuckoo control room, there was one white door, it looked like it was off a boat, it even had the wheel that opened it. I opened it and saw a black space, I stepped in and started floating, I saw a television floating with its plug whipping around, there was an old coffee commercial that used to be on in the late fifty’s, there’s this lady who puts a cup on a table then makes out with her husband behind it. I bump into the television and the coffee spills out, a huge coffee waterfall, the coffee changes from black and white into brown. I’m in a coffee waterfall, and I land in a coffee swamp. By now I’m just about to peak, I can feel it, but I feel my guardians presence.
I had never seen my guardians face, he always had the thing a grim reaper wears on. But this time felt different, more pure.
I’m standing in a coffee swamp, the coffee comes to my chest, the decrepit trees around me start rumbling and my guardian slowly rises out of the water in his pure form. Its a black face, it seems old, but like an old artifact, his face is much bigger than me, and oval shaped, he has no hair or body, his mouth is neutral and his eyes are closed. As he begins to talk his mouth doesn’t move. “You are about to be in a world you are not meant to journey into, you don’t belong there, you will be a foreigner in lands that are not physically possible, you are venturing outside of your native dimension. You will be in many dimensions, this I cannot stop, but I can bring you back home.” It that his eyes opened wide, but I saw no pupils, I saw space, rapidly changing colors, stars blinking and exploding out of existence in mere seconds, I flew in, supernovas blew up all the stars. It was black, I heard my guardian say “Don’t make the big mistake”. Then a far way away, I saw a portal, inside was a black and white world, it grew bigger and bigger. I had reached the peak.
I saw the dimension approaching quickly, no, it was sucking me in, I landed in a typical town from the 50′s, everything was black and white, a town was in the middle of the desert. Nothing was bending or moving or appearing any more beautiful than it should be, apart from everything being black and white. I was going to ask somebody where I was exactly. I opened the steel door which was tinged with gold around the edges. There was food and even coats here, but no people, it appeared as if everyone has up and left. As I stepped outside I noticed a large cloud of billowing smoke a street over, I cut through an alley, I noticed a huge pile of burning bodies, at least I thought, on closer inspection I found it to be clothes. A huge pile of burning clothes in the middle of nowhere.
I was intrigued as to what made the citizens of this town leave the diner and burn their clothes. I peaked into one of the houses, I saw a light coming from upstairs, I carefully opened the walnut brown door, and started climbing the stairs. I saw a television on. It was in color, I was on the T.V, lying back on the couch, I was having an out of body experience on a T.V. I wanted out, I took a baseball bat from behind the couch and destroyed the T.V. As I walked back down the stairs I knew I needed to find a way out, I needed to find my guardian. I walked out of the house, the street just ended and a desert was all that could be seen.
I walked out of the town, I saw a large sand dune and climbed over it. I saw a burial site, many graves, about two hundred. And one man, an old man, sitting in a chair. I asked him “What the fuck happened here?”. He looked at me and said “Their all dead, and you killed them”. I staggered back, memories of me killing the townsfolk started to flood my head, were they real? They were more vivid than any memories I had ever had before, I closed my eyes and clenched my teeth. They began to fade, when I opened my eyes, the man, the chair, the grave site, and the town behind me were gone. My guardian was on a sand dune in front of me.
We walked through the desert “Why am I here?” I asked. “You have been caught up in the Dimensional Transition, its the journey you should take when you die, you have had such an imbalance of chemicals in your brain that it has decided to throw you into it early, so you don’t kill yourself.” “You can’t die from acid, I say” “If you were to fall down a stair case or cut yourself with a knife, you would, you’re unstable, you might have died in the basement if I hadn’t made you drop your flaming toilette paper roll” He says with a flick of his gloved wrist. “Well whats the Dimensional Transition”, I ask. “When you die, you experience a massive DMT trip, within that trip, you’ll make the Dimensional Transition, its different for everyone, some experience it once at death, some many times with various drugs, and some never becuase their death destroyed their brain” “Yeah, but what exactly is it?” “A self discovering journey, most have never made it past the 3rd Dimensional Transition, but you, you’ll make it to the 4th, the only way to get to the 5th Dimensional Transition is to die, its the ultimate, every bit of knowledge will be yours, you will know everything that ever happened and everything that could ever happen, then you die” “There’s nothing after the 5th Dimensional Transition?” I ask. “Nothing” “So am I in the 1st Dimensional Transition right now?” “Yes” he answers. “What is the difference between the different Dimensional Transitions, exactly?” I asked him. “The 1st Dimensional Transition is childhood, you remember the time you burned your clothes in the Nevada desert when you were 4?” The memory shot back into my head, I was four, camping with my parents, one night I was afraid that there was a spider in my clothes so I threw them into the fire. “But why the strange town, and the burial site, and the old man?” I asked. “That’s for you to figure out, now the 2nd Dimensional Transition is life, or life after childhood, then comes the 3rd Dimensional Transition, which is death, an awful, awful place. Finally, the 4th Dimensional Transition is mind, the purest form of enlightenment a human can experience without dieing” he said “Well, have fun on your travels” “One more thing” I asked “whats the 5th Dimensional Transition called?” He turned to me slowly and said a final parting word “Soul”. With that he walked off.
I was walking through the black and white desert, but with a single blink the black and the white became negatives of each-other, the sun was black in the sky, the sky behind white as the moon. I heard the melody from “Black Hole Sun” drift through the desert air.
I saw a door and its frame, standing in the desert, connected to nothing, I walked all the way around it, it didn’t seem to lead anywhere, I opened the door, and saw the black “In-between-dimensions-space”. I stepped in, and floated away.
The space between dimensions was different, it felt like there were tinges of color, like if you were to take only one hit of mescaline, you’d feel if you were in a dark hallway, with a door with light behind it, behind that door are open eye’s, but you just can’t reach it.
I felt something start pulling me from behind, I tried and tried to turn around but I couldn’t, it was sucking me down, my body became sedated, my feet became wet, I was being sucked down a wet black hole, I closed my eyes, and I was in a tree, about 5 feet off the ground. I eased myself down, I was in a forest, large pine trees loomed ahead, there were no stars or moon in the sky. I stepped out of the brush, a dirt road tore through the forest, both ways seemed to go on forever, on the right I saw a light post.
After about five minuets of walking, I reached the lamp post. It was tall and black, the lamp was attached by hook, swinging in the absence of wind. I looked behind it, I walked all the way around it, when I came back around, I noticed a bike, halfway buried in the road, I wanted to dig it out, so I could traverse this forest road with a greater ease. I started digging it out then the ground started to crumble, I fell through and landed on the other side of the ground. The ground was only an inch thick, each side had gravity. I was on the reverse side, I looked down (up?) the hole I had just made, I saw the street lamp, rocking back and forth quickly. I looked around, I was surrounded by the roots of trees, sprouting up like bushes, I noticed the bike’s lamp turn on, it started moving.
I chased after it, it was weaving through the roots, until it was caught between two. I grabbed it and started to ride it, I saw the light of my hole, I began riding tword it, but it was closing, I flew through, and landed on top of the repaired hole. I sat my bike up, it was dark, the street lamp had been warped and bent by something.
I began riding, the head lamp of the bike was helpful, but the surrounding woods still scared me. The trail stopped, it was now a cliff, I looked down it, it seemed to go on forever, I looked left and right, they also seemed to go on forever. Then I turned around, my bike looked like a T-Rex had stepped on it, the trees all around were destroyed, I saw the tops of trees all around falling, a group of some large something’s was coming for me. I jumped off the cliff.
I was falling, after a few seconds I saw a glowing orange and red tinge, then I saw them, the huge glowing rivers of lava and the black brimstone surrounding them. I hit the ground hard. I stood up, my head dizzy. A man in a designer suit walked up too me, no, this was no man, he had a red face and small horns sticking out of his head. “Are you the devil?” I asked. “Hahaha, the fucking devil? Yeah, I’m the devil, my friend the tooth fairy and Santa are here too!” “Where then fuck am I, is this hell?”, he looked at me, and said with a laugh “Hell? No dumbass, this is Sugar Candy Mountain” “Who are you?”, I asked. “I’m Dave” he answered nonchalantly. “What? Dave who?”. “I’m Dave Burnstein, diphthong, now come on, lets take a walk.”.
“Why is this place called Sugar Candy Mountain?” I asked, still confused by the whole situation. “I don’t know, man, why is Seattle called Seattle?” He asked me. “It was probably the name of some Native American tribe” I answered quickly. “Well then, shut the fuck up, smartass”. We walked over a brimstone bridge that crossed a huge river of lava, we came to a fork in the road. The sign read, “LEFT: Dave’s house / RIGHT (unreadable)”, we went right.
We walked in silence for a bit, until I asked “So is this the 3rd Dimensional Transition?” “What? No! You think I would live there, that place is awful, its a warped place, the worst of all Dimensional Transitions, I would rather go to your hell then go there.” “Oh”, I said, “I’m going there next” He stopped dead. “WHAT?! Why? Thats a fucking terrible idea!”. “Well, I have to, its some spiritual journey or some shit like that.” We started walking again. “Well, I’m sorry for you man, not even guardians will go in there, and they go into bad trips all the time. “Guardian’s? Theres more than one?” “Yeah, you selfish asshole, everyone has one, they’re a part of your brain” “Are you a part of my brain?” “No, I’m Dave, dumbass”.
“Sugar Candy Mountain, the name is familiar to me, its from a book called Animal Farm, it was their heaven, if this is where they ended up then I feel sorry for them.” “Hey! I live here, buddy, how would you like it if you took me on a tour of L.A. and I told you how shitty it was” “Sorry” I mumbled. Sugar Candy Mountain’s ground started becoming less black, until it was bright copper. Dave stopped. “Well this is as far as I can go, see you later man” He turned around as I said “Bye”.
I walked, and walked, and walked, and walked, and walked. The ground so gradually changed from copper to white that I hardly noticed it had leveled. I was in a world of white. This was nowhere land. It was boring. I kept walking, off in the distance I noticed a blue streak. I walked to, it being the only thing to walk to. I realized it was a fast moving, clear river, flowing through nowhere land. There was a single white sail boat, attached to a single white dock, in a single white world. I hopped in the boat, untied it, and was whisked away.
I must have been going twenty miles per hour, I was moving seamlessly through nowhere land, but it wasn’t like I was going anywhere, since there was nowhere to go. I heard a loud noise, the stream grew larger and larger until it was a river, then a channel, then an ocean, with a white sky. I kept floating and floating, the noise grew larger. I looked down, massive fish, the size of skyscrapers with multicolored scales and magnificent glowing eyes swam about in the clear water below me. The water was so clear it was as if I was floating, yet so deep I couldn’t see the bottom. The noise grew larger and larger until I realized what it was, a giant waterfall, going endlessly in each direction.
I was going to go over it, it was circular, like a drain with sheer edges, in the middle was an island, with black sand. I braced for my travel off the huge, thousand foot waterfall, just as my boat went over I jumped out of it. Pointing my body, as I hit the water I blacked out. I woke up on the black-sanded beach. The island wasn’t very big, only about 100 feet from one side to another. All black sand, no trees, no houses, only one structure, a large, black obelisk with a purple portal in it. I knew where it lead. I called out for my guardian, his head rose from the water, its eyes closed, just as it had in the coffee swamp. “Go whenever you like, but you must make the journey through the 3rd Dimensional Transition, you can spend as much time as you like on this beach, but you must go eventually”. I sat on the black-sanded beach, dipping my feet in the pleasant clear water for what seemed like hours, but my fate was inevitable, I got up, and stepped through the portal.
I flew through this purple void, with magnificent, deep tones of dreary colors mimicking emotions, wondering where I would end up. I closed my eyes, and opened. I was in a bathroom; I could tell it was Asian style, due to the shape of the toilet. I heard a rumbling, I stepped outside the bathroom onto an empty, dark train station, an empty, lightless subway car showed up, seeing no other way to escape from this damp, dark place, I entered it.
It started moving right after I stepped in, there was no voice, and nobody was sitting on the train. It began picking up speed, faster and faster. I sat in a seat, it was awkward and uncomfortable, around the dim train were scratches, everywhere, the windows were shattered but not broken, it was a sad place, as if all love had been sucked out of it. I looked out the window into the subway tunnel, an absolute absence of light unfolded over me, it was darker than dark. I looked away from the window, a man, seemingly homeless, had appeared on the train.
He was wearing a heavy brown coat, with a hood pulled over his head, he was looking down. I wanted to talk to him, but found that even looking at him caused a sense of loss in my chest, like he was draining my soul, I looked down at my feet. I looked up again, he had moved closer, and was now about 5 seats away. I heard a tap on my window, I glanced at it, nothing, but he had moved another two seats closer, still on the opposite side of the hall. I closed my eyes, hard, hoping to reappear somewhere else, somewhere better. He was across the hall.
I stood up and shouted “Just who the fuck are you!? “. He shivered. He spoke to me in an accent that I couldn’t place, but his voice was deep and tortured, as if he had been screaming all his life. “You shouldn’t be here, but now, you can’t escape, the driver will find you, he found me.” He slowly lifted up his hood, revealing a bald man, with no eyes, and deep scars all over his face and head, he smiled a broken plead for help. The train stopped, he got off, while I was left, bewildered and terrified.
I wondered who the driver was, I decided to walk up to the first car of the train to find out. When the train had stopped where I got on, I counted about 5 cars, but, as I walked through these cars, they never seemed to end; I must have walked through about 50 until I gave up. I picked up a piece of glass and scratched a large X on a window, I walked through a train door, the X was still there.
I sat down again in desperation, the train would need to stop sometime, I waited, and looked out the window, I saw a young Indian boy when I looked away. I walked up to him, he didn’t have an heir of sadness about him. I asked him “Where am I” He turned to me calmly, and said “The 3rd Dimensional Transition”. I had known where I was, yet I still staggered back at the news. “Where are we, exactly?” I asked. “This is the train that goes between the different realms of the 3rd Dimensional Transition, right now, I am leaving this place.” “How?”, I asked “They are going to kill me”. I looked at this innocent, harmless little boy, and I wondered who would ever want to kill him “Why?” I blurted out. “Because, it was either this, or 1,000 cycles of 1,000 years of torture, after that, you are either let out of this realm, or the driver makes you a torturer” “So this is hell” I asked him. “Such a place does not exist, this is a passing place for souls who cannot bear to leave their fears behind, or to face them, there are three options when you end up hear, to cease existing, be tortured, or to face what scares you most, but me, I was born here, I have a soul that is only tethered to this dimension, I can never leave this awful place, so I must cease to exist.” “Oh…” I said, “Well, why does anybody choose thousands of years of torture over facing their fears” He looked into my eyes and said “Because some people have grown so poor in life that all they possess is money, they haven’t a heart, their judgement is clouded, they are not punished by force, they believe that they will find a loophole, that the universe will bend to their whim, people who never realized that they are not the center of the universe, money holds no power here, the only power in this world is held by the driver.” “Who the fuck is the driver?” “He is an entity, much like a guardian, but he is not looking out for the protection of souls, he processes them, the torture will eventually make all memories of previous lives disappear, from there, they are either recruited as a torturer, or sent along to their journey to the 5th Dimensional Transition, if they choose to cease existing, they are brought to a place where they will drink from a chalice, and die, it does not hurt, there is no wait, they simply cease to exist, or, they can face their fear, by going through the cave, the cave morphs and turns, it knows you better than you know yourself, it will root itself into your brain, you’ll be subjected to mental torture, which the weaker minded cannot even begin to stand, now get off at this stop, if you take a left through the canyon, you’ll be tortured, if you go right, you’ll go to the cave.”I got off the train, and left the small boy to his cruel fate.
I was in a cobblestone square, it was deep underground, the walls were made out of obsidian, and a red clock post hung from the ceiling. To the left was a jagged canyon, to the right, was a trail. I went to the right and followed the trail, when it stopped into a wall, near the trail was a metal door, with crimson paint, I opened it, and found myself in a cave.
Near the door was a weaved basket with four torches in it, I grabbed one and lit it on the single torch above the door, I began walking through this cave, my eyes began playing tricks on me, I would hear screams, see movement out of the corner of my eye. Then on the floor, I saw a line of red paint. I knew what it was, it was where the cave would bury into my brain, I closed my eyes and stepped over it. I was on the Titanic, or some ship from the 1900′s, I was in a ball room, pitch black skeletons with large bulging blue eyes peered at me, I touched one, he turned to dust and blew away, a gasp fell over the crowd and the music stopped, his dancing partner stepped back into the crowd. They began walking tword me, faster and faster, I turned around and ran through the kitchen door and I was back in the cave, I picked up my still burning torch from the floor and kept walking, the cave was on a downward path, so I wasn’t turned around.
I heard yelling and screaming from the inside of my head, I would hear footsteps behind me, only to turn around and not see them anywhere. I saw the tortured man from the train running full out at me from the darkness, he was bleeding heavily, once he was about a foot away from me, he faded from existence, as if he was never there. I blinked, and an eye appeared on the wall of the cave, more and more began opening, a moaning noise started, it was layered, as if a whole stadium was moaning, hands began coming out of the wall, grabbing at my face, I noticed another red line on the floor, I closed my eyes and jumped over it, desperate to free myself from the hands.
I was in a twisted, dark hallway with purple wall paper that was peeling off, behind me was only a wall, there was only one door in this hallway. I noticed that there were picture frames along the wall, but there wasn’t anything in them, the carpet was burnt along the sides, I came to the wooden, white door and I opened the door. It was a dark room, a single candle was burning on a dresser, a woman in a wedding dress, whose face and hands looked like they had been charred by a fire, she was just a skeleton, with bits of charred flesh falling off her. She was cradling a baby who looked about the same as she did, as if it had been in a fire. She turned to me, her eyes fused shut, she uttered in an unbalanced voice “Don’t wake the baby”. Her eyes jarred open, revealing a blood shot monstrosity of an eye. She started screaming, I turned around, opened the door, and I was back in the cave. I kept walking, a young girl in a white dress appeared around the corner, her spine cracked and contorted, I could only watch as her body morphed into a jumbled mess, then, she dissipated and disappeared. I felt as if the air was running out, I would keep hearing voices and whispers in my head, I would not become aware of their existence until they ended, and I could never remember what they said.
For what seemed like days I walked through this cursed place, experiencing dreadful hallucinations. Until I noticed a foreign light source, it was the brightest thing I had seen in the 3rd Dimensional Transition, I walked uphill to get it, up and up, a large, golden door was in front of me, light leaking from all around it. I opened it. I was in a white room with golden trimmings, it had a soft focus about it. In the middle was a fountain, I jumped into the clear water, it was bigger I was in an ocean of love and happiness, at the bottom, I saw a door radiating the purest light I had ever seen, I swam to it, opened it and stepped through, I was on my way to the 4th Dimensional Transition.
I was out of the 3rd Dimensional Transition, my back felt lifted, like every single step I took was effortless, my very existence was pure here, I couldn’t recall any negative memories, the 3rd Dimensional Transition seemed like a different world, like it was a movie I had turned away from.
I was on an island in the middle of a lake, surrounding it was a colorful forest, with a house flickering in the difference. I found I could walk over the water, it was amazing, below me, fishes in all shades of the rainbow swam about, I walked over to a cobblestone path that appeared to be made of emeralds. I followed the path through the beautiful forest the sky seemed to change colors, every thing seemed so intensely beautiful that I almost couldn’t even comprehend the existence of a world like this. As I stepped on cobble stones, they would change into different colors, I felt like I heard music that didn’t exist, I could have stayed in this world for hours on end, observing the multicolored birds fly through the multicolored trees.
I stepped into the small house, and I was in a large palace in the sky. But it felt faint, like it was a dream I was leaving, at the top of the stairs was a huge, forty foot tall golden portal, I knew where it led, and I knew I didn’t belong where it went. The scenery around me began to collapse, it all crumpled and I was alone in a void of darkness, then I saw it, a door, a plain, old brown door. I stepped through, I was on another plane, outside of all dimensions, shapes that made no physical sense moved around in ways that shouldn’t be possible, intense geometrical shapes made of love. I felt like I was moving, accelerating, faster and faster, then I hit something, I stopped and heard a crack.
My eyes were closed. I was still high, but I was in my own house. It was a manageable high. I got up from my couch. I went out through the back door. The sun was rising, and, out of all the landscapes I’d been through, it was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.
See you next time space cowboy.
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@phishphan, Alright, I’ll give you that the beginnings are similar, but thats just a coincidence, I’ve seen that video, and pretty much everything in my story is different, believe it or not, with 7 billion people on Earth, two are likely to have experiences that are the smallest bit similar.
@thomaschong, I actually have never tried weed. I never once sought it because I did not see the effect worth it. My intrigue for hallucinogens comes from a desire to face a reality that I cannot right now. I want the awareness. I have not pushed for it yet, first seeking to greet the thing that promises so much, but I feel that I will not be able to avoid it. I really am eager to see.
@thomaschong, Speaking to someone who’s gone so far and come back unscathed is quite comforting.
@lytning91, Have you felt psychosis before? I have (I believe) and it is purely fear. That is all it is. You begin to fear, but you don’t know what. You pick anything and everything out to fear. It is like a panic attack, but instead of anxiety building, you get fear, paranoia, anxiety, all bursting. You have no idea what’s going on and pretty soon you start to lose touch with people. You can’t talk to people anymore because they either don’t make sense, or they make too much sense, they become as transparent as glass. But this isn’t bad in itself, but the fear keeps building. It wears you down, and as you go on trying to ‘figure out’ something that isn’t actually there, the psychosis develops.
Been there. Done that.
Then I stopped fearing. Its like two worlds, ying and yang, happiness sadness. If you meditate, and objectify yourself, you can walk between the fear of psychosis, and the happiness of being alive. You realize psychosis isn’t some disease, it is only a state of mind, just as depression, just as anxiety. It is not some pit that you fall into and never come out of again.
You fall in, you see it, now climb yourself back out.
But some will fall in, see it, and run in circles, treading water, getting no where.
I’ve seen it a dozen times, sometimes I get to help people back, sometimes I don’t.
But, since I experienced it once, I always inevitably trip back into that hole. It isn’t fun, but I always know I can come back.
Really I want to know why some of us are more sensitive to it. Why did I experience it, while others have not? Why do some of us go there, but most never do? Stirs my gut writing about it every time.
@ijesuschrist, I don’t know that I have gone that far. I know that I have fears, but I know that they also do not control me. I know that in order to retain self I must face these fears and so I make a note to do it, and to push the boundaries that I have and make the progress that will insure I one day eliminate them. I believe that the self can withstand a lot, so long as what you say is true. Having the resolve to find your way out, despite the magnitude of desperation one may face. I speak from a place where I want to acknowledge my fears, yet all the while I know I will not rest until I have moved passed them.
Hey Tommy, thank you so much for sharing that. I thought I had a bad experience with acid until I read your story, now I look at it as a learning experience instead of a nightmare. You should share this one on LazyKush. I know a lot of people there would love to hear your experience with 50 hits of acid.
@drunkmonkmeth, you miss the point of what I was saying. Were it to be confessed that he were the “real” Chong, this site would get bogged down with a bunch of halfwits who ruined the whole purpose of what goes on here. I don’t care one way or the other, because whoever it is, their information is legitimate and informative. Can’t really ask for more.
@thomaschong, Never said it mattered.. never implied it mattered either. I just simply asked if you’re the real Chong. Your name is ThomasChong @thomaschong which would generally imply that you are indeed Thomas Chong, but you know its the internet and you can never be sure. I have this longing desire to know when I’m unsure.. (its a human thing.) So I had no choice but to attempt to find out by asking. Oh and of course when someone read my question they had to attempt to analyze my reason for asking as if there was a deeper purpose hidden in the text I wrote assuming that if it weren’t really Chong I wouldn’t read or would have dismissed what I have already read.
but no its all separate.. I saw the name and decided to ask.
@drunkmonkmeth, Well, I might be, but I also might not be, I might be a four year old kid in Swaziland claiming to be a celebrity, I might also be a celebrity claiming to be a four year old kid in Swaziland, you’d have no way of knowing, man, just enjoy the company. It ain’t easy being cheesy.
@thomaschong, Your trip report sounds like what my dreams are like – however of course you forget dreams usually as soon as you wake up. Reading through your post, a couple of times I felt like I was dreaming.
How similar to a dream-state would you say your experience was?
@thomaschong your story is amazing. i have never done acid before, out of disinterust and fear. but wow.. this story, just blows my mind. like something i would only find in my dreams. a real life like experience would be amazing. how has the experience changed you? if you dont mind me asking.