have any of you tried to be someone you’re not, sexually? tried to hook up with people just for the experience but felt really bad the next day because you felt in your heart that it wasn’t you? Have any of you lost respect for yourselves for one night because you just wanted that experience? I am not mad because the person I was with does not know who I am at all on the inside. I am mad because I do not know who I am at all on the inside.
Sex is much more powerful socially and psychologically than our culture lets on. Everyone obviously should have their own choice in the matter, but personally I don’t do one night stands any more. Sexual intercourse to me is an act of trust, love, connection, lots of fun, laughing, awkwardness, disappointment, encouragement, sharing, giving, living. It’s all of life brought into a single act, a series of moments. I think as humans have become more intelligent and more broadly conscious of themselves, we have overplayed the fun of sex and underplayed the emotional connection and sacredness of this incredible gift we have. If you’re having sex purely for the fun of it, I believe the emotional disregard you treat your and your partners’ bodies with will catch up to you.
This is a very ambiguous title… I was expecting lucid dream sex. But this is interesting too!
Perhaps look at your situation from another perspective. You, as a result of the experience you are regretting, are now able to define yourself further than ever before. You say you are mad because you don’t know who you are on the inside. Does anyone know who they are? You are seeking to define your essence prior to your existence, when you should be living life the other way around. You should first exist, essence-less, then continue to exist in that manner until you die, upon which point you will be defined.
One who comports to a pre-determined existence lives a narrow restricted life
@citygirl9050, Few things, it doesn’t completely determine who you are,so don’t feel bad for having an experience that doesn’t jive with you. Learn from it, that’s how you learn who you are, finding out what’s okay and what’s not. If it doesn’t feel right, don’t do it again. Have some compassion for yourself, love yourself, and maybe try and see what’s causing these feelings
You want him to want to know who you are?? This is a tough lesson I have had to learn through my own experience.. Sleeping with a guy or girl will not make them be interested in who I am and get them to like me or want to know more. Just by “hooking up” with them before they know who you are kind of determines the relationship you will have with them, because that’s the energy and messages you have put out. Does this relate to what you’re saying or help in any way?