Confession, falling out of love with HE
I spent a GOOD amount of time here when I first discovered it a few months back. I LOVED it,a-like minds meeting to share and learn through collective consciousness? Awesome!
I first came here basically looking for a place to toss out a few things, clear clouds in my head. And I did clear my cloud, it’s been great. Learned a few things along the way from a few people I really should give credit to as well. But I took what I learned and applied it. I get so caught up in life these days, it’s hard to stay dedicated to this site.
So now when I come back to this site, it’s new group of people talking (for the most part) about the same stuff as we were a few months back. Now don’t get it wrong I’m not hating on that, I just noticed there’s some people here who are essentially like guides. They have all the questions and depth they learned and are ready to share. This is where I differ. I don’t have all that much interest in sharing my perceptions.
I sound like a Prick, but this site taught me how to better talk out and gather my deep thoughts. And give more insightful advice, something I was only able to do through handwritten, or typed messages. And I learned when to pick my moments to share what I learned with others, many people need to learn it on their own or they simply won’t value the lessons and realizations to be learned. And if they don’t value them, they won’t stick.
With all these words being said, I am going to deactivate my account and continue moving on. Much like the rest of my story, this site was just a very helpful phase in a critical life stage all in attempt to figure out who I am and what I’m doing, in hopes of being a good book!
So a thank you to all who know me, I’ll keep this site active till the next time I come around a computer. Hope to see and hear how some of you are doing
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I can totally see where you’re coming from Ellie, would you mind helping me out here?
It seems people come in contact with a wide range of ideas (alot of which they already thought on their own or outside HE), they go through a phase of recognition, which is great, but not completely fulfilling (just guessing here?)
Also, getting to HE is a bit like levelling up. Some level up 3 levels, some stay stagnant, some only get the last bit experience for 1 level. The only thing that is common, that at one point, there is not much more levelling up to be gained here. But I do see the potential, so I was wondering if you feel the same way, or could elaborate on what you are thinking and feeling? I really want to make good use of this potential so HE can level up aswell!
hate to beat a dead horse, kirk (I hate that saying, by the way…just terrible) but the whole contribution thing is true, no sense dwelling on how good the past was, though it was awesome, you can’t just discount and forsake the whole community because of a few bad seeds or duplicated flowers…..”biodiversity” is the key to successful evolution, and if you don’t feel like planting a seed or two, that’s one thing but sitting there and watching it change, then expressing discontent about everything when you aren’t helping it become what you yourself want it o be…..makes you just as bad as the rest of us. but all that said
I know you’ll take some good and some bad from your short time with HE, and it saddens me that you feel like you don’t want to be a part of it anymore, so all this said, hope you continue down the road of self development and discovery, man. but hey this could just be a rough patch, can’t bake cookies without heat. so I suggest leaving for a while and come back in a month or two, hell, you might like it again.
good luck, Kirk
Yeah man i mean this site will never have as much to offer as far as growth and happiness go as living life can give you. I went through a similar growing phase when I first found the site about a year ago. People definitely seem to reach a point where its no longer enjoyable to them anymore, and there is nothing bad about that. I come back every now and then because lots of times people share great new discoveries that enrich my life. Sometimes I am challenged to try something new or give up something for a while. Its all fun. You never finish growing or regrowing.
I’m suprised you feel the need to deactivate your account, but i don’t really care either. thats your business. I honestly believe that if ordinary people are given the opportunity to speak about what interests them then they will. the people on here aren’t much different from people on the streets, a lot of them anyway. People are great bro, love them. This website isn’t the holy land, your life is the ultimate awesomeness. So I understand your desire to leave the site behind.
I am sorry to hear you feel that way. I still remember your contributions, and I really liked them and found them original. I learned from you, and I keep learning from new HEthens.
I sometimes get a feeling HE is a drug for many, and once the high is worn off, they move on. Which is great, when you got the message, hang up the phone. But at the same time, if you just repeatedly change phones for new messages, you won’t get anywhere either. (not saying you fit in this latter category, time will tell)
I appreciate it that you took the time to write this post, and have a fantastic life!
“When you get the message, hang up the phone.” – Alan Watts
If your purpose of coming to this site was to grow, of course you’ll have to leave it sooner or later. Just like everything in the quest for growth, as soon as you cling you stop advancing. Things like these can only kick start you to the next level, but once you’re past a certain point it will only hold you back.
Think of it it like climbing up a huge, uneven flight of stairs that’s slowly moving downward. HE is but one step in this flight of stairs. When you’re ready for the next step, just take it, don’t dawdle.
I like the drug comparison martijn. It really is. There is only so much to say.
I just hope those gain from the site, take some time to give back to the new members. To pass the torch so to speak. There is a lot more to life than this site, and this site tells you that.
@Psychonaut If people keep pumping more value into their posts it sure will.
Many of the most value offering people seem to have left this site though, which is a bit sad but that should only encourage others to fill the notch they left.
I’m new to HE, so I haven’t really seen everything there is to see, but I know what you mean. I was on another site that seemed to recycle ideas after awhile.
However, I would like to say that if you’re tired of the same ideas, Kirk, maybe you could suggest some new ideas to discuss. I would like to see more literary types of discussion, for example, but I don’t know if this is the site for it, so I haven’t tried. Maybe what you need is a different forum…
@mANIMAl, I envy your discipline. And at the same time I intuitively refuse it.
I can be stupid and disciplined and obey, but on the other hand, I choose to be the only thing I can be – me.
When you get the message – make fun of it. No message should be taken seriously. Nothing is unpredictable. Hang up the phone ? What are you going to do after you hang up the phone ? Hang up some phones again ? Get the fuck outta here. Improvise.
@pat (haha at pat) I figure that was going to be said. There was a guy on here a little bit ago who went on “Oh this site has gone to shit, no more good conversation blah blah” then someone said “Weeelll CONTRIBUTE”
that’s not my case, I’m not here to learn what people want to share. I came here to help me. And I did, Thankful for it. This site has a small form of magic to it. But I’m not really one for forums, this was my first one. After being shown it I had to join. I normally just check my emails on the computer, this site was my addiction. Just not addicted anymore.
Balls to that, Jordan’s still posting brilliant blog posts, and there’s tons of awesome threads with links to great videos and great ideas. Since there’s over 9000 HEthens now, there’s bound to end up being a bit of masked anonymous flaming, that happens on forums.
Keep up the good work fols :)
“When you get the message, hang up the phone.” – Alan Watts
True enough, but I can’t help but think that what Watts’ was trying to convey with that statement was in a different context.
I went through a phase where I thought I had it all figured out. I understood the message. Time to hang up? Thankfully I realized that the message kept changing every time I listened to it. The surer I am about something the more I doubt its validity. The message changes with context.
To me a medium such as HE is not a finite resource. It is an ever changing context. To think that you can reach the zenith of what HE offers tells me that you have formed the belief that you got the message.
“I don’t have all that much interest in sharing my perceptions”
Sounds like you don’t want your perceptions/belief to be challenged, and it sounds like you have already decided your path. ‘Phase 2 complete, progressing to phase 3’. This kind of linear thinking suggests to me that, if there is a phase 2, you are in its early stages which are characterized by illusions of clarity.
I apologize for coming off a bit the antagonist, but my intent is purely in the interest of sharing my perceptions. That’s what people do here.
@Dick It was in a different context, but it’s the exact same principle. No matter if it’s a drug or a belief or another person, they’re all just temporary, and I think they have a purpose that is for you to “get to the next level.”
I’m not saying you should think you have it all figured out. (remember this thread? http://www.highexistence.com/discussions/topic/what-you-really-know/) That’s not what I mean when I say “getting the message.”
I don’t think that the issue was that Kirk didn’t want his perceptions and beliefs to be challenged, but simply that he was here to learn from others rather than help others. Some want to learn, others want to help, others want both. People are different, and different people come here for different reasons.
However, discussing with Kirk is kind of pointless since he’s deactivated his account. Not trying to come across as an antagonist, just my two cents.