Finding Happiness At A Young Age
I am 16 and through several resources (much coming from this site) and my principal beliefs, i have come to believe that to find happiness you must find what you love to do in this world and do that, not letting anything get in the way (materialism, etc.). I, myself am having a hard time finding my true happiness. I know what i love to do but it seems that it just sits in the background of my consciousness and never really comes forth so i can focus solely on that. I am wondering if that is because i am still obligated to go to school? To be occupied for 8 hours of a day for 9 months, is that whats holding me back? Or is it something else? Feel free to post what helped you find your true happiness, or how you obtained it.
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@highjacob, Hello I’m also Jacob. What is it that you love to do that you feel school is holding you back? That being said, why do you feel school is that much of a waste of time? I know I can think of a million things but everyone has their number one reason.
And on another note, if you found something you truly love to do you’ll always find time to do it. Plus you’re 16 years old with not that much time left… challenge yourself to finish and in the mean time plan and prepare how you’re going to follow your passion once you’re out of school.
@highjacob, ^^^ He’s right. School can seem like a huge waste of time but your best bet is to tough your way through it. You’ll be really screwed if you decide to drop out. It’s REALLY tough to find a half-decent job (even one you’re only planning to use for an easy paycheck until you find a way to do what you really want to do). It’s hard enough with a high school diploma, let alone without one.
Just stick with it. It’s tough but in the end it’s worth it. Plus, finding happiness isn’t as simple as doing what you want to do. Most of the time you’ll have to put up with some bullshit first, school included. Having patience and a good work ethic help a lot.
Whenever I’m in a place in life that I don’t like, I try to chew on these thoughts:
“The mind is its own place, and in itself
can make a heaven of hell and a hell of heaven.” – Paradise Lost
“There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.” – Hamlet
I’m thirty and I wish I had been more mindful and present in high school. Every moment can be a happy one with mindfulness. I’m happy all the time. I could have been happy all the time years ago if I had figured it out earlier.
im in my third year of college and still feel the same way you do at 16. that being said, later on in your educational career- you will have far more options like what to major in and to study.
in my opinion, a solid education is the most important resource you can attain for yourself in todays world. it gives you a fighting chance at a good job so that you can focus on things like bettering yourself and the world without wasting time worrying about how to pay the rent.
your happiness will never be hindered by your educational responsibilities so trust the people above me who have said that you will make time to do what you love/like. rational/logical life never stop but your introspection/growth should not either. find a balance and you are likely to feel good/content/happy.
I’m 16, also. I know the feeling of seeing school as a waste of time, and I’ve had the same thoughts before. I just think, that we have to have some basic knowledge, and the school can give us that. Furthermore, you can use some of the stuffs you learn in school later on.
I spend 40 hours a week on school (classes and homeworks), but after school I go the library to study books and making stuffs on the internet (entrepenurship). At the moment, i’m starting some affiliate sites up I hope I can make a passive income of, and later on I’ll perhaps start webshops or community sites. In the weekends I study arabic and spanish.
I know there isn’t much time for joy, family and friends, but sometimes you have to make some sacrifies to get succes. What I want to say is that you have the opportunities: You just have to have enough passion and you need to want it so bad, that you are willing to use your time after school. Beside, there is always the 130 days you don’t go to school ;-)
@highjacob, Hey! Im the same age! I think I feel the same as you. I know that I am a pretty unhappy person, but I know how to find happiness. Even if it isn’t permanent. I know the things that make me feel good. Like kissing, eating fries, driving around, arguing, drinking espresso. These things make me feel good. Even if only for an hour. It numbs the pain. If I put enough of these together, maybe I can be happy for a long time. But I don’t know. I don’t know what will make me happy in the long run. I don’t think any teenager should. But if we stick it out long enough may we will. :)
Hey Jacob and the other young people in this discussion! I have been working with young people for some 25 years as a mentor, friend and other connections. Jake you wrote: “i have come to believe that to find happiness you must find what you love to do in this world and do that, not letting anything get in the way (materialism, etc.). I, myself am having a hard time finding my true happiness. I know what i love to do but it seems that it just sits in the background of my consciousness and never really comes forth so i can focus solely on that.” For sure to know and move from what you love to do is the ultimate existence, in a manner of speaking. Since retiring from working in September 2009, I am now free to follow my passion of serving young people and all others, moving towards freeing them from the wrong teachings and information that we all get from society, media, news, government, etc. First off, I would say to finish high school at least. And you may find college, if inclined to go and financially able, as a place to explore life, your passions, interact with people from different places and cultures. The education one who is “awake” gains from college actually has very little to do with the classes. Be patient. I recall that patience was in short supply in my teen years and I have been able to cultivate it as I got older. Also, Jacob, I do not doubt that you know what you love to do, but stay open to the possibility that it may morph and change as time and experiences come and go. And as to time, just the idea that we function on a linear concept of time is just that: a “concept”. Time is not real – ALL is eternity. You will come to see that. You are not your body. And there’s no great big surprise as to who/what you are and there’s nowhere to go to find it, no teachers to follow or anything to do. Guess what? You already are who you are. You’ve always been who you are. Who/what else could you be? Find time here and there, to be able to participate in what you love to do – and try to work it in more during summers and other school breaks. Watch this video if you feel so inclined. The person interviewed, Bentinho Massaro is just 23 years old, from Holland, and currently living here in the United States. Just relax into the words he speaks, and see if maybe you feel some little sparks of connection within: http://youtu.be/eqCXTlePoqQ Peace, Love & Light ~ ricky
@highjacob, Happiness is over-rated. The goal is psychological balance, you get that in a number of ways. One way is to embrace your passions and do the best you can at what you are good at. Another way is appropriate interactions and behaviours, not only in what just effects you but to see the logic in consideration of others, such consideration makes for an overall smother existence.
Happiness is always fleeting, it is worth it while you have it but hits you like a tonne of bricks when you lose it. Passions are not pure pleasure, they are often stressful and a buttload of hard work, but as such they are sustainable as a thing that makes life worthwhile.
@highjacob, When I was in High school I acceled in a number of topics; Maths, Science, Geography, I had a love for History, but only one teacher ever told me what I should do, my English teacher said I should be a writer. I didn’t even like English class back then, and she was one of the more strict teachers, so I never really considered it. But then I did 4 units of English at Community College, two 1 units and a 2 unit, and I realized not that I was especially good, but that I could completely wrap myself up in it, I enjoyed it phenomenally even when it was hard as hell.
But up until this point I was just floating through life, I wasted some 10 years because I wasn’t even looking for a passion, I didn’t even know it was something waiting for me to seize, and life has not been comfortable since I have embraced this passion, I will be honest, but it has been worth it, life is better for me now than ever before.
Thank you for all your posts. I think something that is tied into this problem is having the drive to do what i want beyond school. I’m interested in a variety of subjects and people beyond the norm always talk about learning new things and personal mastery. For instance, i’m currently studying latin, playing the guitar, interested in writing, i read a lot, and on top of that i am interested in a path down enlightenment through meditation and such. I find it hard to balance all these things and school when i dont know which will be the ones i truly want to pursue when they all seem very interesting to me to begin with. How does one stay occupied with a task when he has many others that are just as interesting awaiting him?
Well I think that by meditating you are taking yourself down a good path to gain more focus. I know for quite a lot of people out there, with this new information age we have, it’s tough to really decide what to focus on but I would say don’t try to force it and let your mind flow openly. As you begin to delve deeper into yourself you’ll realize that your true passions aren’t forced subjects like you are so accustomed to in school, but questions that you have about your world around you. If you can seek the truth of the questions you have, you will continue to find answers as they arise and little do you know, you’ve found a passion if it continues to create questions for you. Don’t worry to much about picking a “right” path either, I know when I was in high school they really tried to place you into a life path, you’ll know what you want to do when the time comes. Just enjoy it, do your best in school and the rest will fall in place! Happy hunting fellow Hethen :)
@highjacob, trust me, as your life continues post-high school, you will have a lot of things that will occupy you from doing what you want to do. Just look at school as a way to manage your time. Plus, society’s bare minimum for any decent job (that would possibly keep you stable while you continue to do what you love) is a high school diploma or a GED. And you’re already halfway through it high school, I say just stick it out, you came this far. But then again, I am no one to tell them how to live your life, just before you make any big decision, make sure you have no regrets brother.
Here’s a video I happened to find before logging on to HE and I thought about you and your post.