“Fine”

3 years, 11 months ago

Do you think, when asked "How are you?", we respond with "fine" because we are scared to learn that nobody cares about what is going on? Do you believe people don’t have compassion? Is it because we dont have any compassion or love for ourselves? Or is it that we all are actually "Fine"

April 5, 2011 at 6:40 am

You must sign in or join to reply!

1
Profile photo of Krish Jagirdar Krish Jagirdar C (@koin3190) 3 years, 11 months ago ago

I think the question has become a form of a greeting. Like when someone says whats up, or hello.

think about it, when you see someone who is visibily upset you might ask them how they are doing because you are concerned about them

But in the case you saw some one you and greeted them by saying how are you, and they went into a long winded response about how they were feeling. would you be a little taken aback by it?

maybe its just me -.- lol

[Hidden]
1
Profile photo of Ramsh Ramsh (@ramsh) 3 years, 11 months ago ago

Well excluding close friends and family, sometimes people tend to ask you “how are you” out of courtesy and not because they are actually concerned about you, you know.

Suppose you re having a bad day and your close friend asks “how are you today” you will obviously tell him/her that you re not fine and that you re having a bad day but if its someone else (like a not-so-close friend you run in to on the road) you wouldn’t because he/she would not be expecting a “oh my god i m having the worst dayyyyy helppp meeee bla bla bla” and start a deep conversation right then and there and plus you would not be willing to put it out there aswel, you know.

[Hidden]
1
Profile photo of Duke Mabirou Duke Mabirou (@dozmaster) 3 years, 11 months ago ago

I realized this a couple of years ago and then vowed to always do two things:
1) if someone asks me how I’m doing, regardless of closeness, always think about it for however much time and answer completely honestly. The fact of the matter is “fine” just doesn’t make for good conversation, an more often than not you may be surprised who is actually curious about your life.
2) if I ask someone that question, and they give a non-committal answer, always clarify that I’m actually asking and would really want to know. Either I’ll get the same answer, or an actual thought out opinion that can take the conversation in a new direction or give me a chance to ask them if they’re feeling down and didn’t want to admit it.
I don’t like social norms that distance people from each other. This may be a form of Radical Honesty, but I’m more than ok with that concept. – Síjto.

[Hidden]
1
Profile photo of Roma Roma (@escapereality) 3 years, 11 months ago ago

Like Ramsh said, I only tell strangers that I’m fine. If it’s a close friend, I’ll tell them the truth. But I think more than anything, asking someone how they are is just a formality. It’s different with friends because, well… They’re your friends. =) I try not to lie about my feels with my friend because they truly care. And sometimes I’m really just fine!

[Hidden]
1
Profile photo of Alex Eastman Alex Eastman (@alex) 3 years, 11 months ago ago

I’ll normally tell them if i’m doing okay or not. But yes, in some people I can see that being true.

[Hidden]
Reply to this topic

More Posts Like This

3

im sick so it hurts when i smoke pot should i take a break?

So I have asthma and since I’m sick it made me have a asthma attack while I was smoking pot but I usually smoke it everyday but since I’m sick it makes my asthma worse would it be safe to keep smoking it or...

2

The I have nothing to hide argument

How do you guys respond to people saying that when it comes to all the NSA type stuff.

2

1st lsd trip

So me and my 2 best friends are planning on doing acid for my birthday in april, we all smoke weed and we also were doing dxm for a long time so we have kinda tripped but obviously not anything like acid. we are planning...

29

[HE 30 Day Challenge] March ’15 – Dream Journaling!

Is everyone super zen from last month’s meditation challenge? I hope so :) The challenge for March is dream journaling! Dream journaling is the practice of writing down your dreams immediately upon waking (before...

3

Wouldn't you rather live 50 years in bliss than 100 years in prison?

I’m talking about breaking from 20 years in school, another 40 in a long working career, just so you can have a wider profile of self determination within the social constructs we live within. Considering that...

4

What do you Fear?

As I was reading posts and responding to them I decided I wanted to get some input from you all on a topic that I toil over quite often. Everywhere I look I see things like “conquer your fears”, “fear...

1

Does light bounce off the objects we perceive?

we all know that the things we see are matter that reflect certain wavelengths of photo energy from which we distinguish colors, I have this idea (please tell me how i am wrong) that the matter we see absorb photo-energy...

6

The Darkness

The Darkness Are you tired of this shit? Tired of your safe and mundane existence? Tired of pretending to care? What if you just gave up? What if you just did not give a fuck anymore? How liberating would that feel?...

3

why it is so hard to find the right people?

Hi HE! its been a while since my last post here, i have go through an incredible journey in the last two years but there is something that doesnt complete me. I was hopping that maybe you guys could give an advice or if...

1

Not eating meat?

So I think I’m going to try and exclude meat from my diet. I have many reasons for this but this is the first time ill ever be attempting this. Any dietary tips by anyone who doesn’t eat meat? What do you...

2

"The end is coming!"

A local coffee shop that I began frequenting several months ago has become a favorite spot of mine. The atmosphere is relaxed, their coffee is cheap, and their wifi is free. What I enjoy most about this establishment is...

3

Songs with Deeper Meaning…

I love music. Especially the songs with deeper meaning and messages in it as well as positive, uplifting lyrics. So I thought I would share some with ya all :) Go on and share any that you like ! :)

2

I have a guy problem – I really don't like guys.

Hi. I need advice…. I am having a really hard time *liking* guys. I feel like if I make out with a guy more than once if we are drunk or just at a party I tend to have feelings for them, or grow feelings for them,...

11

Intelligence: a Blessing or a Curse?

Greetings HEthens, I’d like to talk about intelligence vs. stupidity. More specifically, I intend to address these questions: Is ignorance truly bliss? And, if so, is being stupid – that is, being perpetually...

2

What are your limits?

I’m curious where you guys place the limit of what you can do. Like in your flow of creating, or being yourself (doing the things you want to do) where do you bump in to the wall which suggests that you should...