I find our current topic article offensive…

So fucking raw

I’ll play the devil’s advocate –

Kayne, what is your suggestion? What words or phrases could be used in place of the one mentioned which offends you so much? Does another phrase really get the point across to the reader?

The fact that you also just stereotyped the entire world by saying “Now everyone is sexist” should offend me, based on the fact that the phrase is literally suggesting that: I believe that men are superior, and women should stay in the kitchen a cook pies and raise children. If it were meant literally, then you would be suggesting that you personally are sexist. There is a big difference between literal meaning, and linguistic meaning, so don’t get them mixed up.

And another thing, You mentioned that: “By saying that it’s easy to insult some people to get your point across to others isn’t acceptable.”; is it actually insulting a little girl to suggest that a grown adult(those who are members of this site) are stronger? I myself would think it would be irrational to believe that any of the members of this site are less adequate at tackling any task than a female, or even male, under the age of… lets say 10 years old; and yes that is what I inferred from the word “little”. So would you be just as upset if the phrase was “are you tired of being a little boy when it comes to social situations?” – I would say on average little boys don’t understand how to handle most social situations and would be just as inadequate as a little girl, compared to a grown adult. So do you believe that the phrase is comparing a little girl to a little boy, or to a grown adult? The relative meaning, intended audience, and surrounding text, of the phrase actually determines whether or not the phrase is sexist, just because the words “little girl” are used, does not equate to it being sexist remark.

Sexism – The belief that one sex (usually the male) is naturally superior to the other and should dominate most important areas of political, economic, and social life.
“The American Heritage® New Dictionary of Cultural Literacy”

I don’t think he was trying to offend little girls, but I’m sure he’d be sorry if any little girl actually read it.

as a parent who gets to interact with little kids all the time it didn’t even cross my mind to get offended. the real problem with the phrase is that little girls are the most outgoing, friendly people I meet! So, really, we should be more like little girls socially.

Wow I love all this! Both sides of this argument are very well structured & valid in themselves. I just hope you guys are able to see that & not really getting upset with each other. @ “Martin’s side”—there’s nothing you can do about someone taking offense to something (“I’m responsible for what I say, but I’m not responsible for what you understand”). Just like Kayne said, “that’s their problem.” (so in that logic, your offense here is your problem Kayne :) and I’m not trying to be offensive please don’t take it like that!). @ Kayne, you’re right about what you say.. but there’s nothing to get upset about it’s just the way it is. I’m a woman.. I know there’s stereotypes-I know I match up with some, and I don’t with others. If it upsets you that stinks…bc chances are that the “world views” on sexism won’t change it your lifetime. I sooooo respect your passion on the topic though.. and I’m sure you have turned some heads & changed the world around you in a step in a positive direction on the topic. I think you guys are all awesome!!
*Edit–when I was quoting you Kayne about saying ‘that’s their problem’ if they’re offended–I was referring to your last post on the Gender Roles discussion-sorry for any confusion

its about connotations. the “ugly” words are ugly because of what they are actually implying. niggar is about the most ugly word in the world. not because it was used as a term for black people. but because its use is synonymous with oppression and slavery. Today its a word thats slipping back into common use by comedians and kids who admire black people they idolise. posters on bedroom walls that say “yo niggaz” or something to that effect. and in america black people use it regularly as a term of endeerment towards their black friends. its been claimed by black people cos thats how you defuse the hate of a word. you take it. you make it your own. you change the meaning. its why censorship literally doesn’t work. Its the nuance that matters. not the initial position of the word. it makes zero sense to censor a word if the intent of it still exists.

but well here’s the thing. because we spend so much time talking and communicating language becomes so ingrained in peoples consciousness that they think they actually mean something in and of themselves. they don’t. the intent behind them is whats significant. the word itself being wholly insignificant in comparison. do you think your subconscious thinks in words? cos thats where your internal nuance exists. thats where the intent of your words are. its why you have freudian slips. and sometimes you even say things you don’t mean… but ya really do. or sometimes associations you have with things are completely different to other peoples because of the connotations and nuance.
When i was younger i thought the word JEW was a derogatory term like niggar because we have no jew population here. the only context i had ever heard that word used in was movies about nazis. When i heard jews using the word in other tv shows i always thought it was just jews that could use it.
I highly recommend becoming disillusioned with language. you free yourself from taking all kinds of “offence” that there is no justification for, only backwards rationalisations. its like when people talk about the irish they sometimes call us paddys. but there’s a massive difference between a “paddy!” and a “Fuckin paddy”.

1. I have seen and love the Vlogs of Amber, who posted the response to the Beyonce video.
2. I am a woman, and I completely happy with the parts of me that ARE weaker, softer, and more feminine than that of my male counterparts. I was born a girl, and I was never forced into BEING a “girly” girl, but instead, was a rough and tumble kid who played ball ( all sports, lol) with the boys, could catch a horse in our field and go riding holding onto a mane only, and could outclimb, outshoot, and likely out fight any boy I knew growing up, especially if I resorted to “female” tricks and utilized what I naturally am.
3. There is nothing wrong with a woman who WANTS to be more masculine, who wants to be more equal with men. But to say that men and women are equal in general is, in my opinion, a complete fallacy. Men and women are VERY different physically to say the least, and IMO, a woman should be PROUD to BE a WOMAN!
4. I disagree with the suggestion that referring to someone as a little girl is an insult, and instead, is merely a categorization. Little girls by nature are naive, innocent, soft, loving, and timid, while being talkative, outgoing, and wily at the same time. The description of “Being a little girl when meeting new people” is not offensive unless you are the type to purposely seek out offense in anything possibly gender related. Little girls are OFTEN nervous and shy around new people, despite their tendency to be hyper and their desire to impress and for approval. That is all an outward display of their desire to be liked, loved, accepted, and protected, which is an INBORN trait in MOST of the girls I have encountered in my life. I am a mother to 2 gorgeous girls and the step mom to another, and I would MUCH rather have my girls proceed through their early years guarded, timid, and over analytical of things than I would they rush headlong into impulsive things like boys are wont to do.

@Rain

I’m glad you said it, because I surely didn’t want to. Women and men are different. They are physically built different, and in many ways they are psychologically different. I think the idea of these two things being “equal” is an irrational argument. You can’t ever say an apple and an orange are completely equal, because they are two completely different things. Sure you may find an apple and an orange that weigh the same, but that only makes them equal in weight. Comparing a man to a woman is a similar comparison. It is also illogical to imply that one is inferior, overall, to the other.

@Kayne – you can really take offense to anything, especially if the phrase is meant to be negative. The only way to really keep from offending people is to never use any type of negative language. You could never say that anything is bad or wrong. That is the only way to not offend people. Every statement would need to be objective, expressing that one thing is different than the other; even the word “less” can be taken negatively, and it is used to express measurement and mathematics. So to not offend anyone, you would have to completely remove any type of language that could be considered negative, which would never happen because of the fact that any language can be meant negatively. At my work we say people “have a big neck”, and it just means they are trying to look strong, like a body builder. It’s meant negatively because of that person’s individual actions, not because we think body builders are inferior.

The fact that you believe that the entire world thinks of women as inferior to men is just your negative outlook on the entire world. I personally believe the general population is dumb, that doesn’t mean they are, it just means that’s what I see when I look out my window or drive down the road. Just because you believe something, doesn’t make it so.

Martin, I think you are missing the point and going off on some fairly unrelated tangents. You were challenged for saying little girls are socially inept. Personally this doesn’t offend me as I know it’s nonsense and I can rise above it. However, I believe you owe it to Kayne and others to admit this was probably not a good choice of words on your part.