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| TheWalrus
What if
Upon our meeting I asked You for just one thing?
Would you give me the chance to look in Your eye?
By A thing more provident than Chance
Would your eyes soften with a smile
so gentlly as to outline the corners of your mouth?
The Energy flows
Both of us inside
Where wisdom grows
And all warm feelings start and flow
Know
Friendship
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| Anonymous
@grosshaj, put more feeling into it, develop a vocabulary, use metaphors to stimulate the flux of sentiments through symbols, its nice but not good enough. I understood your poem intellectualy but i didnt feel it, a poem without feeling is impotent.
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| TheWalrus
@seeker, Thank you for your feedback. :) You are welcome to read and comment on anything I produce. Encouragement for reading aloud. :)
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| Anonymous
@grosshaj, im glad that you didnt react negatively, you can be whatever you want, develop those synapses! :)
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Anonymous
Anonymous
