I’m disturbed by frightening and demoralizing nightmares that involve sexual desires of the opposite sex, not hating men in general, but in my dreams I’m just scared and feel engrossed I don’t understand why or where these dreams come from, because nothing weird happened during my childhood, and i got those dreams suddenly since a few years they return when i wanted to get rid of desires of my own and others all together by becoming more conscious about desires and being free from desires. The thing i talk about is rape, murder, prostitution, imprisonement, sexual demoralizing behavior in general, why does this happen and how to get rid of them? Is it something inside me or something bothering me outside myself, like some influence or something? Or is it my involuntary scary imagination? how to control it to happy thoughts and happy dreams? I question myself this as a female, because i dont know if men experience sexual dreams as involuntary or scary at all. I could think it is because i’m scared of it that i dream about it, but it doesn’t make any sense because i was always scared of it but now even more because of those nightmares, and also more people are scared of it and they dont dream about it, and I’m not consciously traumatized only those nightmares traumatize me, and i had some weird friend in a bad circuit a long time ago, does that make a link to my unconscious?
@manimal I so much do understand what you are saying, part of me agree’s with it, but part of me believes i need to restrain and train and evolve myself into a better human being by behaving morally acceptable, while in fact my core emotions perhaps are just not that in tune with moral behavior. I have two different sides, the animalistic and moral side, but maybe i should have good and bad or maybe i should have no judgment about it at all..
For example if someone does something that is unjust you can either make a fuzz of it, scream, react on it, find someone else to do that for you or run away< OR you could just suffer in silence……..well that is the thing that bothers me constantly, my evolving behavior tells me to suffer in silence while my animalistic behavior wants to protest against it..i would even come to think that my repressed me is a protection mechanism, while my moral me is the one suffering in silence………exactly what you say when you describe the feeling of fear, just feeling the fear not acting at all just stay frozen and feel the fear burning along it is just insane………….WHY have i told myself to feel the burn and keep on burning it is strange………i dont think it is healthy..it is some form of learned helplessness, because when you act upon it, it becomes animalistic, but maybe that is a good thing..
well the root of it all does come from culture, civilizations, religion, dogma's, we learned to act a certain way because some form of behavior is seen as good and the other is seen as bad. And the good behavior is rewarded while the bad behavior is punished. Now when you repress feelings, that clearly is not the way to go, because it turns out to attract exactly what you don't want in life. But being moral, you can not just act upon your first instincts, or can you?? Is there a life to live when people act on their first impulses, without making life a chaos. For example, discipline, intelligence and control are things learned in civilization, not really something animalistic. To teach oneself discipline is some form of cruelty against ones nature. Yet the lack of discipline results into laziness, is that a judgment of a bad thing because it is something we as a society dont see as a positive characteristic of human kind. Yet perhaps animals do have discipline and some form of intuition but it comes natural to them, but i come to feel that discipline is something you do without wanting to do it at the core of your being. It is a form of molding yourself into something else, something more refined.
I don't understand it, animals do have a clear structure of how their life is, and it works in tune with nature without needless harm right?, yet people have this learned civilization that go's against the core of nature to prevent chaos, a clash between cultural values and natural instincts..to find ourselves in our true nature should we evolve ourselves by being more culturally distinct and moral (feelings of love, compassion, altruism, conscious, intelligence) or should we evolve ourselves by going to our roots in nature (feelings of passion, anger, fear, intuition/instinct)? OR is going back to our roots in nature the same as going back to inner peace (feelings of love, intuition)..with other words, do animals have inner peace and do they evolve spiritually or is it merely something humans strive for?
As a Sagittarius, it is supposedly very natural to me to want to ascend from my animal nature. To find that higher state of being, or to be more human, per say. Hence the symbolism of a horse that is half man. We are striving to become more than animal, and find higher forms of reasoning and better forms of behavior.
I think everyone has that desire in some way. It is part of us though, our animal nature. We still hunger for food because our body needs the sustenance. Where would you be without that hunger? Would eating be the same?
It is better to embrace who we are truly, because we are who we are. You cannot run from yourself.
It is possible to learn how to control your mind, and choose every thought that goes into your brain. I can’t do it, though I believe many people can and do. That is something worth learning.
Eliminating desires is a tricky thing, because when you have no desires, what’s left? Perhaps there would be peace and tranquility. That’s not so bad really. But at this point you have to wonder where is life headed? It would not matter so much what happens any more. It would simply be a passive existence. This is a very deep and masterful way of living, but is it really something you would choose?
This life gives you many paths that you can take, and they all lead to enlightenment. Don’t forget your morals, but don’t forget that God gave us desires either.
Animals have their own way of life. They are also intelligent, but they’re perception of the world is very different. Their minds are different. I would say that we humans have an ability to be very moral. Accepting to be that way is your choice, and choosing otherwise may have consequences. But we shouldn’t forget that we have instincts like any other animal, and that these instincts are very real and shouldn’t be simply ignored. Feelings are important too . They guide us, and come from the soul. Your words are of the mind. We should always seek to evolve. And have no doubt that as a society we are constantly evolving. Always follow your heart, Dreamer.
My thoughts about the dreams that are based off your fears, are that they are trying to show you how not to be afraid. You have already seen your fears now and are stronger still. I know it may be a painful memory, though now you know that your alright even though you had a bad experience. This is part of life, learning not to fear so much. Acceptance is a much better route. Even if it makes you feel bad. You are loved Dreamer, don’t forget yourself. Be proud of who you are, and eat cheese! :P
@heartbeat, Morals are subjective. It’s just a made up concept. There are no objective morals whatsoever, what is moral and what isn’t is an individual thing. And here’s the thing most people fail to understand about morals, you can rationalize them from anything, you can justify it however you want. Morals can be conjured with no basis in reality, because morals are just very firm opinions.
Suffering in silence isn’t evolution, it’s a slowly working poison. It’s more like devolution.
A choice is not animalistic, a choice is human, choosing is what humans do. But humans are animals, with a lot of animal desires and behaviours. There’s nothing wrong with that, it’s just who we are. One could argue that there is no desire that is not animalistic, because we are animals, and anything we do is therefore per definition the action of an animal.
There is no such thing as being moral or being immoral, because everyone follows their own morals. Morals have only one purpose, and that is to assert and justify desires.
Life cannot ever be chaos, because it all follows patterns, it’s all just cause and effect. No good or bad, just actions and consequences.
Of course animals have intuition. Some animals have discipline, because they’re cognizant enough to understand some things and make decisions. Great apes and cetaceans are common examples. And this can be seen in the ways they live, and how it differs from one specimen to the next.
Cultural values are just a result of manipulative domestication of humans.
These ideals, norms and standards are not there for you, they’re not designed for your best interest or anything like that. They’re meant for domestication, turning humans into livestock and pets, AKA society. Society and its leaders don’t give a shit about you or your feelings or your well-being, they just want something from you, they want to use you.
The problem is that a lot of people think this is a benevolent thing, that social conditioning is there to prevent bad things, but it really isn’t. That’s just one of those things they say to lure and sway people into compliance.
That’s where all -isms, religions/belief systems, trends, and so on come from. They’re all just meant to sway people, and unite them like an ant hill serving the interests of one person only. The ruler.
And they come up with all sorts of bullshit to glorify and romanticize this compliant servant state of mind, all sorts of bullshit to keep you distracted from seeing what you’re doing to yourself, all sorts of bullshit to blame and use for excuses, all sorts of bullshit to keep you going in circles for them. Getting your strings pulled.
Look, we’re born individualists. We’re born in our optimized natural state of flow and peace, but our immersion in society (and religions and such shit) distorts our minds, turns us into something we’re not. And most people never realize that this is not what they really are, and that this is what’s causing all their agony.
Like I said earlier, there’s a lot of glorified and romanticized shit about teachings and beliefs, but they are nothing more than that.
All this new agey spiritual shit, it’s no more than beliefs and opinions, and it’s only there because some fucker wants everyone else to think just like he does, wants them to value the same things, strive for the same things, and so on.
And all the nice pretty stuff they use to convey that message is just made up. The spirits and all that jazz, it’s all made up. Just beliefs.
Humans in their neutral optimized state are not savage, that’s just the same kind of bullshit they make up to keep people away from this. Out of fear. Demonize that which you want people to stay away from, and they will stay away from it, that’s the principle at work here.
Humans are not crocodiles, our natural behaviour is very different from theirs, humans are “good” by nature. Humans are not robots, not units in a system, we’re individuals with free will, desires, emotion, dreams, etc. Never forget that.
Your purpose is not to sacrifice yourself for some made up bullshit.
Your purpose is to be you and do what you want and fucking enjoy it, and of course make some babies to keep your legacy alive.
If ideals clash with true identity, ideals is what has to move, it is really the only thing that can be moved. Your true identity will not ever change, it is what people like to call the soul or spirit, it won’t ever change. And it’s worth more than any ideal, opinion or theory ever will be.
If life isn’t good, you’re doing things wrong.
It’s like one of those toys which consist of a box with holes of various shapes in it, and blocks matching these shapes. What you’re doing is you’re trying to fit these blocks into a hole where none of them fits, a hole that was not originally there, that isn’t supposed to be there. None of the blocks will ever fit, no matter how hard you try to force them through.
Now imagine the box and the blocks were connected to your nervous system, so that whenever you try to force something in, it hurts like bloody hell.
That’s pretty much the scenario here, this is all just a metaphor for what you’re doing in your own mind.
You’re fighting a pointless battle which cannot ever be won. And you’re fighting on the aggressor team, attacking something completely innocent.
Something which is the main part of you.
You say you want to avoid destructive desires, but you’re clearly run by this very destructive desire.
As an awnser to your qeustion , Im a man , and I have these kind of nightmares . These nightmares are very excruciating i can barley handle this . I just woke up from one they happen every night . I think when I was younger I got date raped , sleeping in farout places.
Well, my dears, I cannot recall ever having these sort of dreams. Perhaps it’s because in my dreams, I am always sporting a baseball bat in my hand. Who would dare risk their lives by trying to harm mine? :P
I do hope you find peace in your dreams, Dreamer :o)
@heartbeat, This is actually unnatural….. i know this case I used to have those weird dreams everyday .
I know that part of you agrees with it while sleeping .. but when ur a wake .. you feel annoyed and by time you become depressed …
I had to use pills adviced by my therapist just to get rid of those nightmares but nothing worked :(((
but now , Thank GOD, they’re gone
soooo , if you still have those nightmares just let me know and I will tell you what to do :))
@vovinawol, so that would mean it is something unconscious inside myself that i have to deal with, maybe that i dont know how to handle raw passion my own and others, because i feel threatened by it in normal life so i suppress it, something like that? because i t is something i suppress somewhere i dont want to acknowledge the reality of this world that bad things happen and women are not save in some parts of the world, but it freaks me out..