Is it better to make things happen or allow things to happen?

3 years, 8 months ago

I know it is ambiguous but that is kind of the point. What are some examples of some situations which would support one side or the other?

August 28, 2011 at 5:51 am

You must sign in or join to reply!

1
Profile photo of Jason Jason (@geauxst) 3 years, 8 months ago ago

Always make things happen. Take charge of you life. Allowing things to happen, I mean that is a given. Of course things are going to happen no matter what, just don’t resist them and learn to capitalize on the opportunity.

http://www.tumblr.com/photo/1280/7176488464/1/tumblr_lnqjf2GBIB1qg9taq

[Hidden]
1
Profile photo of Ty Ty (@tymr) 3 years, 8 months ago ago

Allow things to be made to happen.

When you hear those words of wisdom, “allow things to happen,” they don’t actually mean sit on your ass all day and wait for things to happen on their own. It means to actively do things, but attract them with a natural mentality of allowing, not forcing. It should feel effortless. Rather than working against what ‘is’ to make what ‘could be’, follow what ‘should be’ with your thoughts, and subsequently your actions, and they will happen seemingly on their own. Nothing needs to be forced.

An example of that, sort of, might be the story of the Sun vs. the Wind, or Power vs. Force.

“The Wind decided to challenge the Sun to a contest of who was stronger. Whoever could get the coat off of the man sitting in the park would win. The Wind went first. He blew harsher and harsher winds at the man, trying to ‘force’ the coat off of him, but the man just held on to his coat tighter and tighter. Finally, the Wind gave up. Now it was the Sun’s turn. His strength was in ‘power’ rather than force. He emerged from the overcast clouds and shined down on the park, brightening the day and creating a beautiful scene. The man in the park smiled, took off his coat, and embraced the suddenly more welcoming mood of the atmosphere.”

I know it’s not a practical example, but it demonstrates the idea of ‘allowing’ rather than ‘forcing.’

[Hidden]
1
Profile photo of ELI var namnet ELI var namnet (@manimal) 3 years, 8 months ago ago

What’s the difference? I mean, things happen, can you be sure you caused it or didn’t cause it? Of course not. No matter what, it’s made to happen, by something in the world. Maybe it’s you, maybe it’s someone else, or maybe it could even be some butterfly or whatever flapping its wings on the other side of the planet.

BUT, full engagement is always better than passivity. If you want something to happen, make it happen. Don’t quit until it’s happened. Maybe you’re the direct cause, maybe you aren’t, but even if you aren’t you still contributed and made a fucking change.

Nothing just happens. It’s all made to happen. You have the power to affect what happens. Not using that power would be a damn bad choice, unless you’re perfectly satisfied with the way the world is. (Spoiler: the mind is never satisfied)

[Hidden]
1
Profile photo of SomethingWitty SomethingWitty (@mynameisjosh) 3 years, 8 months ago ago

I’d say, both. If you want to lead a happy life, you can’t just sit back and let anything happen to you– that probably won’t lead you anywhere besides your mom’s basement, or a cubical job you don’t even want.

At the same time, you need to be open to new things.

[Hidden]
1
Profile photo of messy messy (@rebecca) 3 years, 8 months ago ago

I have always let things happen. Nothing has happened.

[Hidden]
1
Profile photo of Samuel Forbes Samuel Forbes (@unworldlywise) 3 years, 8 months ago ago

When considering this question, I think that it’s important to consider how much control we really have over our lives. “Making things happen” implies a great deal of control. “Letting things happen” implies little or no control.

As a Buddhist, I would say that we have little or no control over the sufferings, problems, and misfortunes that befall us. This is precisely why when we are ill, for example, it can seem unfair or inexplicable. We may argue that we have a genetic predisposition for an illness or that we live in an area of the world where calamities, such as natural disasters are common, but this does not address the fact that these situations are appearing to a subjective self, our own perspective.

We can, however, control our mind. We can learn to “make things happen” inside our mind, our heart, such as training in compassion, love, patience, generosity, and so on. These are all “trainings” in the sense that they can be built stronger and more pure with practice.

[Hidden]
1
Profile photo of James James (@jameslarson13) 3 years, 8 months ago ago

” we try to control things because of what we think will happen if we don’t. In other words control is rooted in fear”

[Hidden]
1
Profile photo of ELI var namnet ELI var namnet (@manimal) 3 years, 8 months ago ago

All control isn’t rooted in fear. Passivity is more often rooted in fear, because you’re afraid of what will happen no matter what you do, or you’re afraid of taking initiative or giving a damn.

Control is used to reach from A to a nicer B. That isn’t fear (unless you fear A,) it’s ambition. If you want things to change, make things change. Be the change that you want for the world.

[Hidden]
1
Profile photo of Ellie Ellie M (@tangledupinplaid21) 3 years, 8 months ago ago

I would say determine the answer to that situation by situation.

[Hidden]
1
Profile photo of Mark-Ryan Mark-Ryan (@markoh) 3 years, 8 months ago ago

create the situation which allows things to happen.
simply put, lets get together and do nothing.
by doin this, things will happen, so jus let them.
be in control by being able to let go.

[Hidden]
1
Profile photo of Milo Milo (@milo) 3 years, 8 months ago ago

Wish not for things to happen, but wish for things to happen as they do and you will go on well.

[Hidden]
1

Little bit of both.

[Hidden]
1
Profile photo of Nikolai Fujimoto Nikolai Fujimoto (@fujimoto92) 3 years, 8 months ago ago

the chicken or the egg…

[Hidden]
Reply to this topic
What can you accomplish in 30 days? Join our site-wide challenge. Challenge Yourself

More Posts Like This

2

Profile photo of Martijn Schirp How Do You Deal With Negative Emotions?

     I’ve always been one to avoid, at any cost, anything I didn’t want to feel. My therapist would tell me that it wasn’t wise, that eventually there would come a time where I...

3
2

Profile photo of ╨▄t̠᷃͛᷃́᷃᷃e̢᷃᷃́᷃᷃͠e᷂᷃᷃́᷃᷃͠v̳᷃᷾᷃́᷃᷃r͓᷃᷃́᷃͏᷃i̻᷃᷃́᷃ͪ᷃q̪᷃᷃́᷃̌᷃u̖̝᷃᷃́᷃᷃e̗᷃ͦ᷃́᷃᷃▄═ Internet makes people's life more patterned

People share lots of information, often useless, but it reflects their souls and interests. It is a property of people to seek for patterns in the world and give them names. So people do so for the information they share...

4
3

Profile photo of Zane What is the "ego"?

So, I have been wondering. I have read many discussions and posts “how to defeat your ego” “my ego is holding me back” “my ego is fighting against me” and so on and so on. Basically,...

4
2

Profile photo of TheAppetizer I am so confused

I’m at a point where I find it hard to agree with anything, and feel lost along my path. I was never a religious person, mostly because I saw people my age who went to church but were not “righteous,”...

1
26

Profile photo of Ishy.gutz What single change would have the MOST positive impact on the world?

Could be societal, political, economical, etc. In other words, if we could only change ONE thing about the world to better our lives, what should it be?

96
2

Profile photo of Ishy.gutz Friends to share my experiences with

I want to get to know people and hear what they have to say. You don’t have to be physically present to develop a friendship. A friend is someone who is wiling to put what their doing down to listen and focus on...

2
5

Profile photo of Tone Tone Reputation Anxiety

I feel anxiety when someone builds my reputation up. If I have a really solid interaction where the person compliments me and I can tell thinks highly of me, I don’t want to ruin this newfound image I’ve...

4
5

Profile photo of eextreme I need some help defining and researching exactly what this is.

   Ok so recently I’ve discovered something truly unfathomable. It was just an average day I went to work got home and smoked a decent amount of weed (sour d) with my friends and after they left I decided...

7
2

Profile photo of rubyred Mute

Hello :) For those of you who don’t know I am Shea. I have the challenge of going mute for as long as possible. It’s been extremely hard with school and the fact that I got sick and couldn’t tell the...

2
1

Profile photo of Viner Cent Tutoring: Student having severe testing problems. Help?

So, I am tutoring in math, and until now I only had to deal with technical problems of students, not psychological ones. I am going to give you some background. I am tutoring a sixth grader, he is 12 years old, here in...

0
3

Profile photo of Viner Cent The Downer of the Now

Here and now, the present moment, is a limited time fragment sandwiched between two eternities.One is the past. The other is the future. Some of you will say these eternities are illusions, that they don’t exist,...

1
25

Profile photo of Trina [HE 30 Day Challenge] April 2015 – Project or Skill

Hello good people! This month’s challenge is going to be different from the others in two ways: The nature of this challenge will allow you to actually show your progress throughout the month, making it more useful...

96
3

Profile photo of Try Me Playa Going Mute

Today I realized that I didn’t need to talk anymore. There wasn’t anything I really needed to say. So starting tomorrow my friend and I were having this discussion and I will be going mute tomorrow for 30...

6
4

Profile photo of Magus Shared account to save on Lumosity?

Hi, so I just got into Lumosity and it would be great to do long term. The only thing is that its expensive, about 70 dollars a year for one person. But they offer a family plan thats 120 dollars a year for five...

71
1

Profile photo of Viner Cent How do you know what to do in your life?

Hi guys, i’ve got some problem with life :P I don’t know what to do in my life: now i’m studying(computer engineering) but don’t know if i want to get a job as engineer. I have a lot of hobby and...

3