It's time to fess up, gays…..
I have had enough of all this pussy footing around, its BS and serves no purpose, the FACT, that you have found a connection with another human being who just happens to be of the same sex, SAYS everything, and it’s time someone just fucking spills it:
Who you allow yourself to connect with is a personal choice, based upon your life’s accumulation, and the only thing that makes a connection ‘bad’ is if the relationship is destructive in nature.
The ONLY THING that matters is that you connect with someone. This is it. This is the Reality of this world. Who cares who it is? If it is of the same sex?
And you’re right, me being straight makes it impossible for me to understand what it feels like to persecuted like you do, I agree 100%, BUT, I do know one thing, I understand how bullies, the ones who feel the need to persecute others out of ignorance, work.
They rely on you to FUEL their anger, so to control you they say something that makes you emotionally respond, this pours fuel onto the fire of their insecurity because they see that you have taken the hook. When you respond emotionally to a bully, they win.
If you do not respond emotionally to them, you win. You defuse them, instead of adding coals to their fire, you are pulling the embers out, taking away their vigor, one ‘lol’ at a time.
How do you do this? Recognize the TRUTH:
((( The ONLY THING that matters is that you connect with someone. This is it. This is the Reality of this world. Who cares who it is. )))
So if someone is mocking you for who you decided to connect with, fuck them, who the fuck are they to judge you so one dimensionally? They are actually the ones in the wrong, you have to know this
once you know it, you will find your anger and rage for someone being so cruel start to subside as you understand the dynamics of the situation more, and recognize that in reality, this individual’s limited world view and lack of understanding of connection forces them to respond to something different as a dog does to a stranger at the door.
((( “as a dog does to a stranger at the door.” )))
This is the truth. Do NOT give them POWER over you for something that, (1) Is a character flaw in them., (2) is an irrelevant point because relationship is about connection.
The negative connotation associated with the words ‘gay’, ‘fag’, etc. will remain a negative only as long you continue to allow yourself to be provoked by them so easily.
The bully wins when you do this, and perpetuates the cycle.
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“I think what you are saying is somewhat insensitive.”
I apologize if I have come across this way. I only meant to point out that,
“But when you know that most of the time it’s a genuine belief that we are lesser people”
these people do not do what they do because their is anything fundamentally wrong with you, it is a reflection of themselves, therefore their words, in reality, are meaningless
@tine, yea, I wasn’t fully aware of your stance until after posting. The replies only filled half of the first page when I started typing, and I kinda carried on, sorry :)
After reading more of your replies further and further into, I can see that we’re pretty much in agreement, though I still maintain that while they’re very ignorant and misled, bullies are just as valid as you, and while they may deserve to get the shit kicked out of them, without anyone showing concern for their thoughts and emotions, they’ll just carry on with how they were before.
Baha, satisfying indeed, but, you are allowing their words to provoke you to an extreme response, doesn’t speak a lot about control when the only things they are hurling at you so far are words…
nowww… if they try to physically dominate you, I agree a different approach altogether is needed.
Purpose is found by the viewer, so I guess to answer your question, yes, but maybe no, their was a purpose intended, though how you translate it and what you get from it is dependent on your specific accumulation
“”But, I also am all for kicking the crap out of bullies anyway”"
A-fucking-men. Though, most bullies were formed within that kind of forge, where they themselves were kicked, beaten, broken, the result being them taught-how-to-seize-control in a very extreme way.
I find the best counter for those who do not know Love or Hope is to give it to them, regardless of how they are treating you. I’ve seen people change just being exposed to the concepts, no one had ever really shown them it before.
“If your beliefs that a relationship is only to procreate are sincere then you would also have insulted all couples who don’t want babies, those husbands and wives that are sterile and those special needs men and women who are sterile. Are they a waste?”
if you dont want babies that is being selfish. if you are sterile that is not a choice but being gay has nothing to do with a sterile husband and wife that are straight.
there are people out there that are meaner than me. but do you notice that there is no world peace. the world is a mean place and quite honestly i do not expect a great life, but if my life turns out to be great… at least my expectations were not let down. being gay straight bi or single.. they are all choices.. but in the end… is being in that relationship for you, the care for your partner, your devotion in life, or to share how you came to exist with another person with whom you created?
“I’m curious as to what brought about this little rant, my friend. Was some mean ol’ bully calling you a fag? lol”
Nah, I wouldn’t care anyway. What brought this up is befriending several couples of gays, mostly male, but one female couple, and having in depth conversations with them about their circumstances and how they feel reality treats them.
And reality treats them baaaaddd at times, NOT because there is anything fundamentally wrong with them, but because what they represent is so different from what the person is used to.
It is the specific individual’s inability to deal with change that is affecting how they respond to something as socially different as gayness.
But, key phrase, “It is the specific individual’s inability…”, NOT because what they are opposing is something a reasonable person would stand against, and if you are gay and feel oppressed, you need to understand, IT IS NOT YOU, IT IS THEM.
Once this truth is fully realized, the bully’s remarks are put into context, where each cutting thing they say is reduced by the knowledge of how insignificant their words are if you consider the catalyst for them
@tine, That’s right! Let love conquer all. GET IT GIRLS!
Homophobia is often the last resort of those SO PATHETIC that they have to pick on the underdog to feel like they belong. As far as insults go, “fag” is the lowest common denominator, and usually only used by those who can’t think of anything else.
Homophobia, particularly the sort that seeks out victims, is a symptom of the truly pathetic!
actually, i honestly do not mind that you have a differing opinion, i was glad that someone who i was talking about decided to comment
your ‘response’ was so extreme and close minded that it was shocking to read…
the irony being, you are acting like i have some intent of not accepting your ideas, when your statement showed clear as day, without a doubt, no question, a complete disregard and lack of understanding or care for someone else’s.
don’t you see your comment as hypocritical considering all that you have said about gays?
@beyond, actually, by the time I was done dealing with douche-mc-redneck, the kid that they were pelting with rocks was out of sight. Not my fault, and I would’ve talked to him, but never had the opportunity. Please don’t make assumptions about me, you have no idea how many bullied people I may or may not have counselled, so just leave your judgements at the door if you would.
I’d like to offer a consideration, I can probably fuck off, I know, but consider it from the physiological plus circumstance, find the circumstance correlation, and if you can, consider the correlation from an empathy standpoint, given the correlation, is the outcome a surprise? Can someone truly judge?
Also, consider relationships from this angle, relationships are about connection to learn empathy, therefore institutions like marriage are socially encouraged, a woman being the natural choice considering the breeding involved.
but the main point is connection, connection is the foundation of society, therefore to judge connection when it is done in a positive way is to deny the reality of the situation.