I wrote this back in 2009 and thought I’d share it here. In today’s society the words love and hate have little to no meaning; simply because no one can agree with each other what they mean. I tried to define love and hate according to how our society most frequently uses the words.
Love is valuing something.
Hate is valuing something negatively.
Valuing something is recognizing something’s pleasurable properties.
Pleasure is to satisfy a desire.
A desire is a want of a specific something which will bring the wanter happiness.
So basically valuing something is recognizing how something makes you happy. But many times the thing which is being loved does not directly bring one happiness. Therefore sometimes what you love is not always liked. This is because most things have different properties. So you may not enjoy taking medicine but you were satisfied that you did because you know that you’ll be better now.
Wow… That was harder than it looked.
So valuing something negatively would be recognizing something’s unpleasurable properties.
Unpleasure is to actively disatify a desire.
A desire is a want of a specific something which will bring the wanter happiness.
So basically valuing something negatively is recognizing how something makes you unhappy. But many times the thing which is being hated does not directly bring one unhappiness. Therefore sometimes what you hate is not always disliked. This is because most things have different properties. So you may not unenjoy lusting but you were disatisfied that you did because you know that you’ll be worse now.
I think english needs more words for love. The way the words are used now I believe this to be a good definition to put in the dictionary. But as you said love is so much more.
If you were to use this definition of love you would always have to ask yourself 3 questions; in order to better define it.
What do you love? [Object] How much do you love it? [Magnitude] Why do you love it? [Reason]
The quest for self betterment rests in how much you understand about yourself. That is why I try to define everything.
If love is defined by each individual doesn’t that defeat the purpose of language and communication? Doesn’t that defeat the purpose of love?
Ok I can understand that but would that not limit your understanding as you stick to generalizations and compromise, while for emotional experiences the being lost for words moments are in my opinion the most valuable. What better then to experience something beyond comprehension which is untouchable, unquantifiable, etc….
The purpose of communications is to enable the creation of understanding and therefor learning and progress, the moment progress occurs definitions need to be reshaped….
it is never done..
And before loves purpose could be defeated it must fist be thoroughly defined and this is something impossible therefor my answer is no.
you forget empathy, sympathy and a whole range of other emotions mankind is capable of you can not just distillate one and pick it apart, thats not how it is constructed i believe….
To call the emotions of another nothing in my opinion is very thin ice.
To project such thoughts is tricky as you are just you….
@alien51: Can you give us examples of something you love and something you hate, and why? That’s the kind of thing I’m curious about. What do you hate a lot and why?
I think it’s hard to break up emotions into categories. I’d say “emotion” is a sphere, and feelings are blobs that can inhabit multiple regions of that sphere. to some degree we can influence the size/shape of those blobs – or maybe we’re changing our sphere . . . that’s a separate thread.
some feelings are larger than others. I kind of hate the very beginning of the cold showers I’ve been taking but I love the anticipation beforehand, the excitement while I’m in there, and the awareness afterwards. right now, I’d say Cold Shower fills a lot of my emotional sphere!
joking aside there is lots of stuff I misunderstand or am confused by, but I am having trouble thinking of something i’m actively hating. In part because of think of hate as an action, whereas love is an emotional reaction? I feel like I don’t devote any energy to hating anymore. I mean I think subsidies are pretty stupid but I don’t HATE em, you know?
I didn’t call anyone’s definition of love nothing, yet. Logically, “If love is defined by each individual, then love for one person means nothing to another.” rather this ‘could’ be the case. Because it never means the same thing.
I don’t consider love an emotion.
@Dave Bristol_____”Can you give us examples of something you love and something you hate, and why? That’s the kind of thing I’m curious about. What do you hate a lot and why?”_____I hate it when someone interrupts me while I’m playing a game. I hate it because while I’m playing the game I am in a world I love. And the interruption takes me out of it, bringing me back to a world which has many things I hate. I love that world because within it my abilities are greater than many others’ within the world. It is a challenge which is fun to overcome.
haha, you are wrong and one day you will know, that is not an opinion but a fact.
ask anyone with children or a significant other.
“Meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was a choice, but falling in love with you I had no control over.”
Love is many things but a choice…. not very likely
“Love is the condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.”
And to hate reality….. that is not a good thing is it
Ive read it but as you might have noticed i dislike confinement
still searching for clues and answers is a good thing, it is my experience you will only get to know yourself if you are no longer afraid to explore beyond rationality because in the end it is the emotional experience which gives any value to being.
It will be love, and the more you give the more you will get, nobody still has figured out why but it is a stubborn myth and I tend to be a believer.
Ok so what do you expect from life aside from some material items, what do you believe are valuables when you are old and gray…
So Yes I believe the emotional experience to be the only true valuable thing I take with me, wherever I go.
The material items are convenient and sometimes just fun, for the rest,…. nothing
I did not say no rationality, I said in order to discover yourself you need to go beyond it as you are a person with emotions and those can not be viewed purely rational.
You can hide some emotions, to a certain level, no human is completely without emotion, which is a basic survival instinct.
You base your `rational` decisions on emotions, wellbeing, fear, comfort, etc….
Truth is an emotional value, there is no universal truth. and love is an emotional value so basically we agree ….
I don’t believe truth to be an emotional value, also I believe to claim it is is to defeat the purpose of truth. Same logical fallacy with what you said about love. I believe there are universal truths. I don’t believe love is an emotional value; we do not agree.
So there is no variance in truth based on culture or religion, region etc….
Truth as an emotional value definitely has a purpose, to base our decisions on….
to have all purpose defeated based on a believe is proving the point.
There are universal truths, as the laws of nature, but still they are under constant revision…
Then still I am curious of your definition of love as it still eludes me and I wish to understand
“So there is no variance in truth based on culture or religion, region etc.”_____Yes.
“Truth as an emotional value definitely has a purpose…”_____Truth is reality. Emotions do not change reality.
“to have all purpose defeated based on a believe is proving the point.”_____This is getting too twisted to easily comprehend. I believe it was my point that if you believe truth to be an emotional value you defeat the purpose of truth. This of course rests on the definition of truth. Which you say depends on the individual. If each definition of a word depends on the individual then what is truth? It is nothing. Therefore, if there ever was a definition of truth its purpose has been defeated.
“still I am curious of your definition of love as it still eludes me and I wish to understand”_____Personally I like to use the word love as you would the greek word agape. [a love that is divine, unconditional, self-sacrificing, active, volitional, and thoughtful.] Got that from wikipedia, in person I would have described it too you as caring for your entirety unconditionally.
final thought before i turn off, I believe you think highly of yourself, while I also believe it is thought better suited for others as intended for its purpose.
Truth is not reality or can you swear there are no innocent people inside your countries prisons at this time?
Is there a true religion?
And for bitter truth and harsh reality of intoxication, ever been drunk… never went to bed with an ugly woman , but woke up with a few…..
And trying to define love takes more then wikipedia , but that is my believe.
I wish you well and I go to catch some ZZZZ
“final thought before i turn off, I believe you think highly of yourself, while I also believe it is thought better suited for others as intended for its purpose.”_____I do not understand what this quote means.
“Truth is not reality or can you swear there are no innocent people inside your countries prisons at this time?”_____I cannot swear there are no innocent people in my country’s prison at this time. How does that prove that truth is not reality?
“Is there a true religion?”_____I believe so. What is it? I don’t know.
“And trying to define love takes more then wikipedia , but that is my believe.”_____You asked me for my definition of love. I used wikipedia to help define the greek word agape. I like to use that definition. I don’t believe love has an agreed upon definition, that was the purpose of this thread. I think if there was to be an agreed upon definition it would be close to what I initially posted.
Love and hate run in a very similar thin line. You can not truly hate someone unless you deeply loved them at some point. Both love and hate evoke deep emotions meant to be polar opposites but often exude the same feelings. I read an article that researched the relationship and brain activity between love and hate. It found that the same areas of the brain were activated when people expressed feelings of both love and hate.