Mayan particle cannon
ok, here is my context, i have loosely tied together several ideas, taking only surface knowledge of each, and have come to a pinpoint conclusion, the el nino effect, global warming, and the weird weather patterns currently circling overhead, are all the cause and effect of some sort of Mayan energy weapon preparing to fire,
now, from here i can only speculate and sadly, i unable to provide the level of conclusive proof as i did above, but, i personally believe the wise men of the Mayan’s knew that mankind was going to have some trouble evolving, and that only through connection would proof of the evolution be seen, therefore,
when they knew they were about to be wiped out, they set the particle cannon on a delay trigger, giving humanity 2000 years to connect to the point where they could discover the secret to disable the weapon,
and here we are, a world divided, the cold of winter being sucked into a ever-expanding orb of energy verging on critical mass, and its happening right before our eyes,
can we stop it in time?
|Starry Eyed BLiND.|
@tine, What Particle cannon do you speak of?? This sounds like some cray cray stuff.
@tine, uhhh huh.. Your ideas may be too ‘high’ for high existence.
Wouldn’t it be crazy if you called it?
how much for a dime of your supply?
@spaceghost, It’s a shame we wouldn’t even know!!
|General Tits Von Chodehoffen|
Is this a joke?
look at the subject.
also, this is a satire of other Mayan Theories, every bit of it
– loosely tied together several ideas– + –taking only surface knowledge of each– + –and have come to a pinpoint conclusion– = humor
rhino’s expensive and rare, if you give me the location of the energy weapon, its yours for free!
iknorite… well, the satisfaction would only be momentary… =)
man, that expression on Jack’s face reflects my own atm, deranged befuddlement
i believe it is hidden, using no geographic context i propose the following, the cannon is sucking energy under the ruins of their temple, the temple, where the calender was found, (im assuming it was found in a temple), it the collection point, the energy then passes through the earth into the mouth of the particle cannon, the energy is reaching critical mass and will eventually activate a deadmans switch that cannot be reversed
@tine, It’s off the Yucatan coast. I’ll be lighting up in the control room watching it all go down on ancient Mayan HDTV. HEthens are welcome
@tine, it is I, the great mayan jesus, I have come from the center of the universe to set off the immense energy cannon, fueled with my magic mayan jesus urine. It’s too late to stop it!
nice, do you like their TV network? i got it the other day but the blank screen kinda got old after awhile, i was like, ‘where da fuck is the character development? what!!? that scenario is too improbable to be real!!! how bout some real actors!!” and after hours of yelling like this i decided i no longer enjoyed the “Interactive” aspect they advertised that was the deciding factor in my decision
dangit… i knew Jesus had something to do with it, his pretend b-day being so close and all! Alas, we will find the energy source and defeat you, even if i have to drink the urine myself, tis of little consequence as it reminds me of one of my fetishes!
see, you couldnt predict a enemy willing to drink Mayan urine back when you started this plot! i am here,
i am.. the Urine Guzzler! (… for power… of course… )
@tine, (bystander): MY HEROOO!!!
*bystanders (chanting in unison): “CHUG! CHUG! CHUG!”
Me: “(chug) uggghhh, -gasp!- -sputter!- -cough x3!- (gulp of anticipation) (chug), omg… so vile… ugghhhh -wretch x3- (chug) -smacks lips-…. not bad, has an ancient tangy flavor that’s hard to pinpoint….”
@tine, I know that taste… it’s the tastes of VICTORY over ancient mayan jesus
Holy shit this thread is awesome.
But where’s the twisted misunderstood villain who wants to harness the power of this thing for some completely unintended purpose? And where is the mad scientist with the same ambition, but for a completely different reason? Where’s the earth’s defense mechanism (some form of beast/s) gone haywire, adding another dimension of trouble to the equation?
And where are the damn wizards and robo-suits?
@manimal, magic mayan jesus ^ is the answer to most of those questions
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