There’s a large misconception floating around, among the many, that people need to ‘find themselves’ either before they can commit themselves to something, or when we are feeling ‘lost’. It’s a psychological thing within you, or whomever is ‘lost’ that they had somehow misplaced themselves, I’m thinking “How the fuck do you misplace yourself?” or perhaps yourself ran away for whatever reason, how the fuck does that happen??! Did you live your entire life not knowing where you are? Does that mean you’re entire life you’ve been making everything up and your personality is fake and with no value or tangibility? IF YOU’RE NEITHER HERE OR THERE, WTF IS GOING ON?! You must have no idea what is going on, because you will never ‘find yourself’ no matter how hard or far you look.
From my experience, there is no ‘you’. The idea of ‘you’ is what you’ve made up all along for what you thought you wanted people to think of you so that they would either like you, or leave you alone. Anyone could be a nice, bitter, depressed, angry, jealous, happy, vengeful, creative, logical, faithful, the list goes on. Point is, sometimes we chose to be one of these, sometimes we don’t; it doesn’t make us ‘who we are’, you only think that’s who you are at that particular time. The idea of you is only an idea, ‘you’ are nothing.’You’ are not an individual, the idea of ‘you’ might be but probably not.
Now looking back to the beginning of this note I suggested that you would never ‘find yourself’ no matter where you looked, and that is simply because you are searching for something that is actually nothing, non-existent other than the idea of what you want to be perceived as.
With that said what are we left to do? Sounds fucking depressing right? “How dare he say I am nothing!” I can only assume what you’re thinking at this time. Back to the question, what are we left to do? Well, you could see this as absolute shit and go on that never ending quest to find yourself, or you could read on and give me a chance. Being nothing isn’t a bad thing, it’s actually not a thing at all. It allows full creativity to you to make who you want to be!
1: Ask yourself, who do I want to be? Surely you’ll want to be individualistic, because really who wants to be someone else?
2: Decide who you want to be and begin to create yourself. There will be bumps along the way, you’re new to this, and so is everyone else. I can’t tell you what you’ll do wrong because I don’t know what you’re going to do.
3: WARNING: There is a major difference between acting the part and being the part; Acting is merely being perceived as what you want to come across as, this is inconsistent and will not stick. If you are acting the part, you probably don’t actually want whatever it is you’re doing. Being the part is being who you want to be with or without someone watching you, it’s consistent and you’ll be looked at as someone real. It will feel great and people will either love you or they won’t, you’ll accept both at this point.
I didn’t intend on making this a HOW-TO, but it came out that way.
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