Compliment one person on something about their style, dress, haircut, accessory, etc-These are things people use to express their identities-and you are positively reinforcing the idea it’s ok to be yourself by a simple compliment.
This is great. Today my aunt told me I look so much like someone she saw! But I told her that I doubt he’s as brilliant. So I complimented myself and tapped myself on the back. It was a great experience of expressing my own identity to myself.
@manimal, I’ve been pondering about this for a while. Not all impressions are fully conscious. And everyone has different preferences so not everyone could be impressed by the same things or even not at the same time if they’re not in the mood for anything. But there’s nothing wrong with trying to impress others as long as it’s not harmful and completely selfish.
To correlate your what you said on the other thread, “A person that doesn’t make itself happy is insane.” The whole idea of people communicating with each other is to ponder what’s good and what’s not, the sad thing is that we tend to do it mostly with strangers we already liked or hope to like, most of the time we’re prejudicial motherfuckers and size up pretty quickly everyone, then we decide if we want to get deep into “knowing” the person.
This reminded me of “the rules to live by” by George Carlin.
“Size people up quickly, and develop rigid attitudes based on your first impression. If you
try to delve deeper and get to “know” people, you’re asking for trouble.”
“Don’t fall for that superstitious nonsense about treating people the way you would like to be treated. It is a transparently narcissistic approach, and may be the sign of a weak mind.”
“Spend as much time as you can pleading and impressing others, even if it makes you unhappy. Pay special attention to shallow manipulators who can do you the most harm. Remember, in the overall scheme, you count for very little.”
Still, to me more often a compliment without really meaning it is a lie. And I can’t compliment a dress, sorry ladies, I’m a fucking asshole, I’ll compliment you if you made it yourselves. Nice decoration though. Your ass looks fat in those jeans, because your face looks like a potato.
Now that I think of it, I’d rather make someone laugh with a joke and tell them the truth than deluding them that they’re the most perfect and best looking normal human beings with various traits and the ability to change appearance.
I won’t give a compliment to people that are obviously begging for it. They could simply get the fuck out of my field of view. :)
Hmm but the concept of fashion. I would day I dress to display my ideals and who I think I am. And I know many people who do the same. It’s why there are different styles-similar mindsets.
Hippies, bikers, fitness clothes, neutral clothing, accessories, types of shoes- sandals vs. shoes.
What you wear can reveal a lot about who you think you are and what you value in life. As well as your mood that day.
At least in my observations of people an friends.
This is very nice to try. And it’s fun. For example, I got this weird hat that makes my head look like a condom, and this lovely shirt. –
But mainly I wear stuff that feels good on my skin and my feet. Because basically that’s what’s of importance. It doesn’t really say what I value in life.
There’s even a shirt with this simple message:
@jeslyntweedie, I love your facial expressions in your pictures.
@drunkmonkmeth, You’re a fucking wolf, thats awesome. We should hang?
@beyond, Nice sweatshirt, it looks comfy as hell. I would probably rock your hat too.
@manimal, I like that you arent being a dick today. Also, as far as physical features, pretty brain you got there.
@ilooklikeawaterbottle, You remind me of jello. I fucking LOVE jello.
I believe my work is done here.
@beyond Good points. Though I don’t agree about the “not all impressions are fully conscious” because, while it is true, it’s due to ignorance. If people paid attention to what they were doing, such subconscious garbage would not take place.
@yoinkie Haha nope! I have been a dick today and yesterday. There’s nothing worse than undue compliments, so would you please take it back?
@jeslyntweedie Excuse the foreigner, but what the hell is a financial district and why do people live there? I live in a normal medium size town, just like any other, except there’s a big well renowned university but that’s the only thing “special” about this town. I don’t see how an area makes any difference on people’s self expression.
And that stuff you said about expressing uniqueness through clothing, most such people are just hipsters who try to be unique or funny or whatever. That means, they’re trying to impress people, get street cred from other hipsters for being “original” (read: generic and fake.) And the stuff you say about people of some areas being more expressive is actually just proof of the contrary, they live in an area where people wear “expressive” clothing and so they jump on the bandwagon. Same principle as trying to be original, and by doing so not being original at all.
Dressing a certain way does not express who you are, you’re just showing off how good you are at memorizing media-made associations and recreating them. “Fitness clothing” has nothing to do with fitness, other than being marketed that way, biker cloths have nothing to do with motorcycles except it became a trend among bikers. It’s got nothing to do with bikers.
That’s just making yourself into a characterless stereotype… lame. If you want to wear a fucking wolf shirt wear a fucking wolf shirt, it doesn’t make you a nerd just because they’re popular among nerds, etc. There’s nothing less self-expressive than following a style, well I guess you’re expressing your obsession with fitting in, which is of course self-expression too but that’s not what people mean by self-expression. Like those ridiculous people that have long hair and wear studs just because “I like metal dude.” Ridiculous.