Push me a little further…
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@beckable8p, Well, guess what. I love you and everyone else. There must be a reason we are here if it took billions upon billions of years for the universe and then nature to create us. In my opinion, life is too grand to end ones life. I was nearly suicidal last year during my depression. After a good 6 months of it, I finally came through, started meditating, took psychedelic mushrooms, and am now so in love with life itself I do not know where to begin. It is a transformation. People tend to avoid the problem with drugs and other things, when in fact, they should be moving through it, accepting it and coming out the other end a better person.
But to your main question, yes and no. Everyone is looking for attention pretty much all the time, that’s why Facebook’s “Likes” are so popular. However, I would say a suicidal notice via the internet is more of a cry for help, and the internet/computer is just their tool to do so.
Edit: How can someone want to be suicidal in a world where there are videos like these out there? :) http://www.highexistence.com/videos/top (Watch the first 3)
@beckable8p, “Do not pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a difficult one” -Bruce Lee.
Whether it is the conventional praying to a ‘God’ for strength, or praying to the Universe as a whole like I do…I’ve found it be quite useful, especially because I find it nearly impossible to meditate because my mind is always racing.
You said your heart gets lonely if you don’t have someone to hold it. But you have to realize that YOU are the one holding your heart…literally. Your heart is much too precious and important to allow its well-being to rest with someone else. I made that mistake once, and I got hurt…but I learned and grew from the experience.
I watched some of your YouTube videos and all I can say is… WOW! Taylor Swift better watch out :P I can tell you’re truly a special person.
@beckable8p, first of all: aren’t we all
I think some people do, but I think the need comes from a legitimate place no matter what. Some people on this site have expressed a side of suicide I haven’t really though through as much: suicide as mere curiosity. It is intriguing to imagine what comes next, but I think it is natural to not want to end one’s own life. That being my belief, I imagine there is SOMETHING that needs resolution in those who seek suicide as an answer.
What do you think?
@beckable8p, this is the part where you tell me what you want me to do, dear.
I’m all ears, and eager to be there for you, but I need to know more…to get to know you.
Take it or leave it. Contact me in a PM and we can start talking more.
@beckable8p, I peeled the tape off, no need to thank me. I think that was a damn creative attempt though, hosing the exhaust back in, who does that!?!
Shit someday you’ll be thinking of a neat way to use exhaust for your own design and come up with the solution to pollution. I’ve got faith in you, if anything as a singer/musician/songwriter!
So yep, you’re not done here quite yet, so don’t try getting off that easy. You’ve got so much more to do, it’ll be fun. And you’ve always got other humans to call upon, I know I’ll answer. Invite me to talk the next time you’re out on a drive and I’m out collecting duct tape; we can meet up. :)
@beckable8p, I’ve been lurking in the shadows for a long time on this site, but your post and how it has unfolded has made me join. I just….can relate so much. I’m sure it’s very personal. so, I dare say…as strangers, i think we should discuss this. discussion is very therapeutic even just talking about things you that get you down, just letting someone know helps even if no solution is presented.
either way i hope you resolve what you are going through.
I like what you’re proposing. I think people who are suicidal have very legitimate reasons for beliefs they hold. Their beliefs are the product of concepts they’ve created based on their interaction with their environment, so, it is difficult to truly discover someone’s specific problem as you have not traveled their path. Difficult to extract their concepts and then be able to interpret the exact nature of a person’s mental architecture that is imprisoning them in their head, keeping them from living how they wish they could.
The toughest part is people’s unwillingness to ever really expose their problems, naked for others to see. They won’t even themselves truly face the fear for what it is until they’ve made it over a certain hump, that is, when self love conquers self hate. When they’ve came to a decision that they have irrevokable worth and real potential to be significant in all the ways they want to be. And once they’ve woken up their heart and find their source of ecstacy and strength. Can’t happen overnight. The hearts of others is the key I think. Why they cry out for help (attention). They want to feel loved because it makes them see the good in themselves. If they can just retain a feeling of worth they’ll make it out of the funk. Problem is most see them as cravenous creatures because they have their superiority complexes and tend to offer up only their intellects and not their hearts, in a sensationalist display of pseudo-altruistic, self-absorbed concern. They won’t put themselves on the level of the suicidal. They have to pretend like they know the way, and this is soul sucking to the suicidal person. For they become ever more blinded to the other side of life, because the majority of intimate human interaction they ever get only makes them feel ever more dissatisfied with life and progressively more hopeless. Others take the clothes off of their back without realizing it I feel.
much like @randiriplinger, I speak openly about my suicide attempt not as a means of gathering attention but to be a source of empathy and guidance for others in the pit of suicidal ideation, who need the help. I think people take for granted the magnitude of the idea of suicide itself, writing it of as weakness or general insanity, without actually being open to the reasoning behind why that individual feels the need to end their lives, so each time someone describes suicide as selfish, it is a stab because it totally devalues and makes illegitimate all of the emotions leading up to the act itself or the thoughts preceding it. that said, I think people aren’t looking for attention per se when they are writing about there suicide, be it in their past or looming above them as they type, but the motivation behind the sharing is situational, some, like myself seek to lend an open heart to others, while some seek help.
@beckable8p I think it never is the intention to get attention out of posting about suicide as it is to get help or strength from others that may be going through something similiar. I know I attempted suicide once and I do talk about it openly so that maybe I can help others that are at root bottom in their lives. To reach a form of enlightenment I think that we go through a lot of pain and we go through so many means to take care of it so we feel better and some of the choices are not so good such as suicide, self-mutilation, drugs, etc. Like @lytning91 is saying we are all a bit of hypocrits because it is a knowledge that we are bringing forth and I feel we have all been in a similar place before. It really is a matter of the context of the actual situation
I’ve really wanted to get into meditating, but excuses or not, my ADHD has never really let me just clear my mind… I think too much, its y biggest problem… My heart gets lonely if I don’t constantly have someone to hold it… I need to grow but it’s hard to just decide to do something and expect everything to follow.
But thank you, for the music, for the wisdom, and for caring. I’ll be stronger. I promise
@beckable8p, I have been in situations where i had to deal with people who are suicidal. for every person that came to me though with their problem, i couldnt just say that they were doing it for attention and just ignore them or to get over it, its much deeper than that sometimes. For all I know they could be attention whores (Ive delt with a few that used “suicide attempts” as a way for attention), or (maybe less likely but still very very possible) they are scared of what they might do to themselves and need help. I feel that as a duty to my friends and other humans to help when they are in need, I would rather help someone who doesnt need help, believing im doing the right thing, as opposed to going on with my day and assuming they just want attention. For the first situation if i am wrong, whatever i wasted 30 minutes, 2 hours, whatever amount of time, But if I am wrong on the second, and that person really did need the help of someone… that would be a lot for me to try to handle, knowing i could have made a difference.
In my eyes, suicide should never be an option, every problem can be fixed, its never too late to restart.
This reminds me of the Nashimoto-P song “Wanna Die” (sorry for it being in Japanese)
Actually, this also reminds of a scene in My Ismael where Ishmael is telling the story of someone who committed suicide out of lack of purpose. Ishmael’s comments on the situation was that the committee, who was a man with a lot of promise and potential but simply couldn’t function is the world for some reason, needed to find a society where he could fit in without any societal pressure. At least that’s how I remember it. But what always comes to my mind when I remember this story is a scenario: The man meets a woman washing clothes. The woman, sensing what is wrong with him, orders him to help her hang the clothes. This action results in the man, who was left to his own devices for much of his life, finding purpose in it and comes out of his funk.
Sorry, I seem to be rambling. To sum up, there are some who commit suicide looking for attention, and I think such people should not be encouraged.
@beckable8p, I tend to think a lot myself, but usually it doesn’t get the best of me. I mean, I will just fight myself back and forth until I find a way of resolving the conflict. It has driven me to really be bold with other people and situations, including reopening a wound I thought would consume me because I knew I wasn’t going to be satisfied until I actually healed the stupid thing.
You have support, obvz, so just relax and allow yourself to be guided by the positive. I’m certain you will succeed in this.
BTW, you need to get a bettuh mic fo yo vidz on the Tube, because I could barely hear you. It was still sweet, though, and I like your style. “C’est la vie” was bittersweet, something I enjoy in art, and I definitely think you should keep cranking out music.