Pushing Yourself For that FIRST step
I admit. I’ve been a little lazy lately with the colder weather setting in and with a lot of things going on in my life. its not that I dont have free time on my hands, I definitely do…I just have a hard time managing it.
The truth is that I want to become fit and be in the best shape of my life, but I feel like I lack that initial “push” to start a new work out regimen.
What can I do to get myself their and more important, how do I stick with someone for a long period of time? I constantly find myself struggling with this issue and its becoming to haunt me. And in a strange way, I know that I WILL feel better about myself when i do stick to working out, but I feel like i dont want to for whatever reason.
One thing that I feel is potentially holding me back is the fear of my character completely changing for the worse. I dont want to become some cocky douchebag just because Im fit. I mean I see it happen all the time, at my school, on TV, even some of my friends.
I dont want to change my looks if my character will hurt others…but at the same time…i want too!!
I think what I need is DISCIPLINE! but how do I discipline myself?
Thoughts? Suggestions? anything….
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@whotheneighbors “The truth is that I want to become fit and be in the best shape of my life, but I feel like I lack that initial “push” to start a new work out regimen… What can I do to get myself their and more important, how do I stick with someone for a long period of time? I constantly find myself struggling with this issue and its becoming to haunt me. And in a strange way, I know that I WILL feel better about myself when i do stick to working out, but I feel like i dont want to for whatever reason.”
You sound a lot like me. I have had this crippling lack of motivation in most aspects of my life for, well, most of my life. And people all around you will tell you to just do it, stop making excuses, etc, but the truth is that, absolutely none of that resonated with me. Come on, I knew all that shit! And yet, I still couldn’t do it… I just couldn’t get started for one reason or another. And it is absolutely one of the worst feelings in the world…
That said, I finally came to a realization one day. I finally realized that I enjoyed the short term benefit of not doing, of procrastinating, etc, more than I hated the long term pain it was causing me… why, I dont know. But its the only logical explaination. We follow the path we perceive to have the least resistance. For some, that is short term gain and long term pain. For others, it is short term pain and long term gain. Why some are “programmed” one way and others another, idk. The mind is a fascinating thing though, and all our decisions are made based on this pain vs pleasure mindset.
You say, “that I want to become fit and be in the best shape of my life” but thats a lie. If it was the truth, you’d be doing it, period. The truth is, that you, like me, only pretended to want it. And that’s not a judgement on you, or even a bad thing. It’s part of the process. Just accept it.
You simply don’t want it, or else you’d be doing whatever it took. That’s the truth.
I don’t know what will finally motivate you to make the push, to do what you think you want now. What I do know, is that if you keep on focusing on it, one day, it will happen. One day, you’ll wake up and you’ll just know, “this is what I want, and this is what I’m going to do to get it.”
No amount of people shouting “no excuses, just do it” is going to make it click for you. It will either happen, or it wont. You either want it, or you dont. Right now, you don’t (and that’s perfectly ok… really, just accept that’s where you’re at). The day you truly want it though, I promise you will know.
Now, that’s not to say you shouldn’t try. Until that day where it clicks, all I can say is keep exploring. Keep looking deep into yourself, and trying to figure out what motivates you, inspires you, etc. Keep looking, and you’ll find the answers in due time. The important part is you’re searching. No one ever found what they were looking for if they didn’t first look. And that’s where you’re at. But don’t stress over the process… enjoy it.
There’s also little tricks you can do to help change your own associations with pain/pleasure. I found the rubber band trick to help me in my process. Wear a rubber band around your wrist, and everytime you have a limiting or negative thought on the topic you’re trying to change, give yourself a good flick or two of the rubber band. It sounds crazy, but your mind will begin to associate the physical pain of the rubber band with whatever it was you were thinking/doing/etc at that moment.
For you, that’s working out. Everytime you think you can’t do it, or you don’t want to, etc, give yourself a few quick snaps. For me, it was quitting smoking. For 2 years I said I wanted to, even half-assed quit a couple times. But it never stuck, and there was a point where I had just resigned to the fate that I “wanted to quit” but never would. Then one day, I realized that that was complete BS. That if I really wanted to stop smoking, I just would, and that, despite thinking that I did, I clearly did not want to for one reason or another. I don’t know why, because my conscious mind was telling me I wanted to quit, but there was clearly some level subconsciously that didn’t want to. Its that simple, either you truly do, or you truly don’t, and your actions will speak to which it is.
So I started doing the rubber band trick. Everytime I got a “craving” I’d snap the rubber band. In the meantime, I smoked like normal. I still had these “battles” in my head because I felt like I wanted to quit but just couldn’t do it. But I didn’t stress out about it, I just accepted that was where I was at in my life. And I kept doing the rubber band thing.
About 2 months later, I woke up one day and decided I was done smoking. Not that I wanted to quit, but that I was not a smoker anymore. I was no longer trying to quit smoking, I just decided I was not smoking anymore, and that was that. It wasn’t hard, I didn’t have to fight myself, it just was. All it means to me when someone says there quitting smoking now, is that they are still a smoker. That they think they don’t want to be, but they clearly do, or they would just stop. End of discussion.
Was it the rubber band trick that did it (or at least helped). I guess I have no way of knowing for sure. But I know the end result, and I couldn’t be happier.
Until that day comes for you, all I can say is don’t stress out about it. Except it, understand it, explore it, but don’t stress about your situation or your mindset. It will change when its meant to, and the day it happens you’ll know… and hey, maybe try out the rubber band in the meantime.
@whotheneighbors, the mind is fully disciplined when whenever your “about” to do anything in your life you get these goosebumps and then a shiver strikes your whole body like lightning before you do it. all day, every day. discipline your life and how you live it to that of complete loving intent. love is true discipline.
Im in the same boat. But ive made a plan instead so im currently mental preparing myself. When i was in higschool i took a cardio kickboxing class and i absolutely loved. although i also had two gym classes a day while doing this, i lost weight so fast once i started this. I realized that you dont need to run, to get cardio. You just need sweat. constant elavated heart rate and lots of movement. I fell in love with the idea of kickboxing and MMA. For years ive been wanting to start training for kickboxing but knew that it wasnt the road i should take for a number of reasons, and i had to accept that. And then i discovered Tapout XT. Yes, its a workout dvd and i know what your thinking. You dont need those, thier crap, they dont work, not worth it. I would usually say the same thing, trust me. But this, is different. This is in my eyes a break through in fast weightloss, if your trying to get lean that is. This dvd set is combination of the cardio that i had, PLUS MMA inspired workouts. Which i love, ovbiously. Lol. Also, there is a diet program which is something that i really need because I am no good at knowing what to eat besides salad, which is gross. So theres 2 checks. Heres what im excited about..I like to get things done as quickly as possible, especially when it comes to losing weight. This dvd comes with a 10 day slim down program. Its pretty much the workout of youre nightmares, i wont lie. Theres a video of the weekly progress, taped by the creator of the dvd himself. You see the amazing progress with your own eyes. And it looks like a lot of fun! They had it set up in a gym in front of the wall mirror and they did it everyday for 10 days.
So after seeing this i realized that THIS is the gateway to the body i know i have. IM just too lazy to go to the gym everyday and go there and push weights around or run and share a dirty gym with a bunch of people i dont know. So what im going do, is basically get the dvd for xmas and make it my new years resolution. In the mean time im going to speard the word about the 10 day slim down, and try to round up as many as possible to do the group video and docutment the whole experience. And im actually really excited about it. I know its going to be fun and THAT is what gives me the motivation to get it done ! :)
You are asking “how do I discipline myself”. Your question sounds like “how do I think”, “how do I move my toes”, “how do I do anything”.
You just do it. If you are looking for the “how”, then your mind is just looking for an excuse to prolong your “non-doing”, until it would understand “how” that would happen. You don’t need to understand it in order to do it.
You already know how it works.
Always make sure to start your day off the right way. Strong and happy yknow. Get up and do some warmups and go eat a fucking healthy breakfast. Take a cold shower, come out feeling awesome. The go tackle your day.
You’ll be in a better state of mind because you’re doing things right. You’ll be happier, more confident, simply feeling better. And it grows. Negativity breeds negativity, positivity breeds positivity. So you’ll pass on that nasty junk food shit during lunch and have some fucking salad, and you will feel good about yourself.
You get home and feel fucking great, no need to comfort yourself with some dumbass tv show and junk food. Instead you’re like “fuck yeah let’s do pushups.” Because you have the fucking energy and cheer.
So you wake up next day feeling a bit better because you had a good day and worked out and didn’t slack like a loser, you feel good because you made your previous day good. And so you wake up with more pep and feeling good, you feel jazzed so you go for a run before breakfast. You come out of the shower feeling so refreshed and strong and happy, so the rest of the day is a fucking breeze.
That’s the power of momentum and a GOOD ATTITUDE.
That’s what makes the difference when it comes to motivation. Don’t be a negatron, always keep it awesome.
It’s a game of incremental jumps, nobody gets fit overnight. Start taking steps toward your goal, that’s all there’s to it. You can only take one step at a time, no quantum leaps.
JUST FOCUS AND KEEP PUSHING.
AND STOP MAKING EXCUSES. Don’t stop until you’re FUCKING DONE.
That’s how you get things done and have a good time while doing it.
And don’t worry about becoming a douchebag, that won’t happen unless you make it.
If you turn douchy from working out you were already a douchebag in disguise.
And you don’t seem like it.
Just start working that body.