stuck in a hamster wheel

2 years, 1 month ago

Are they parallel? Perpendicular? Are they even lines? I constantly hear stuff like, “Money doesn’t buy happiness.” but then when I think about what makes me happy, money is a major ingredient. Traveling freely on your own time requires money. Surfing somewhere that you cant walk to, requires money. Visiting another country, beer, weed, friends, food, water, shit even LIVING requires money anymore. Im waiting for the day Ill be taxed for breathing.. Its not the money I am against, its the profiting from peoples misfortunes that I can’t do. I feel there is no way you can have a lot of money without ripping someone else off. I know that you can make money doing what you love, and I am a firm believer in that. The only thing is, I don’t love just ONE thing enough to do ONLY that FOREVER. One day I love writing, one day I love skateboarding, one day I love traveling, the next I love building things, then maybe the next I love photography and painting, and my guitar..I love just about everything, with the exception of working for someone. The fact that people give away their lives, and time with their family,friends, and hobbies, so some rich guy they work for can make his boat payment and go fishing in the gulf. Having a job just sounds plain absurd to me. Even the idea of a career seems insane to me. As lazy and stupid as it sounds. Im not lazy. I have always been a top “employee” (sick 34 cent raises!), getting managerial positions.. not because I wanted a raise, but because I took pride in everything I did. But after seeing how the workforce is run, I don’t want any part of it anymore. The more I try to disconnect with this materialistic society, the more it tries to suck me back in to the black hole. I try to have as little attachments as possible. I don’t have a credit card, my jeep is paid for, I am staying with family, so I don’t have rent or any of that stuff anymore. My only expenses to society now are my car insurance, and cell phone payment. Yet, I still feel like I am trapped in this cycle and don’t see any way out.

Any directions out of this would be appreciated.

December 29, 2012 at 8:08 am

You must sign in or join to reply!

1
Profile photo of paperbackchef paperbackchef (@paperbackchef) 2 years, 1 month ago ago

Sounds like you’re at least better off than 90% of other people, for realizing that finding that perfect pair of shoes isn’t the key to eternal happiness.

How do you mean it sucks you back in? Who’s forcing you to buy things? You’re right that businesses operate to make profits and the world does tend to operate based on monetary transactions. I guess all you can do it live as inexpensively/off the grid as possible (which sounds like you’re doing) and use your free time to try and monetize a hobby…not to get rich, but to provide that base level of income to buy food and shelter.

Remember having low expenses allows you to travel and take odd jobs along the way, other people with large fixed payments can’t take those jobs as surf instructors or wedding photographers since they have a huge monthly payment to make.

[Hidden]
1
Profile photo of Stoney Baloney Stoney Baloney (@adamm0ss) 2 years, 1 month ago ago

I th@paperbackchef, I think I suck myself back in by questioning myself. By allowing other peoples’ opinions to affect my thoughts. For one thing, my family thinks I’m some kind of hippie/gypsy/stoner.. Just one example: because I don’t eat the same garbage, processed shit they eat, I am looked at like a Buddhist monk or something. I try not to even share my eating habits with them just because they think I’m a crazy conspiracist out to destroy biscuits and gravy. And their ways of eating 4000+ calories a day is normal. That taking pills for easily avoidable and reversible illnesses is the right way to live. That I should worry about republicans and democrats. That I should obey all authoritative figures. That what a doctor says, may as well be God spoken. Everything I do and everything I think, is different from my family/friends. All values and ideas are different. I guess sometimes I allow the question, “Maybe they are right, and Im just crazy.” in my head too often. Even when I KNOW the answer.

[Hidden]
1
Profile photo of Stoney Baloney Stoney Baloney (@adamm0ss) 2 years, 1 month ago ago

@paperbackchef, and that is a very good point about not being able to do those things, due to heavy expenses.. I never really looked at it like that and take it for granted sometimes.

[Hidden]
1
Profile photo of paperbackchef paperbackchef (@paperbackchef) 2 years, 1 month ago ago

Damn, I wish my family realized I’m trying to be a hippie/gypsy! Let them think that, what does it matter to you?

When you show up enough times with a huge grin on your face, photos from your travels, and stories about experiences they’ve never thought to try, who will be happier? I do the same thing with my family, and they’re finally started to say “ya know, you do some pretty cool stuff.” Give it time, but don’t compromise your ideals.

[Hidden]
1
Profile photo of Stoney Baloney Stoney Baloney (@adamm0ss) 2 years, 1 month ago ago

@paperbackchef, Haha, I guess thats a good way to put it.. It definitely helps knowing there are likeminded people and I’m not just some insane wrench stuck in the gears of society.

[Hidden]
1
Profile photo of paperbackchef paperbackchef (@paperbackchef) 2 years, 1 month ago ago

Just read something good on postmasculine about Stoicism regarding other people’s opinions of you. Basically:
1) Do you respect the person or agree with their ideas?
2) Do they disagree with your ideas?

If you answered “no” to #1, then it’s GOOD that people (your family for example) disagree with you. That means you’re doing something RIGHT. Imagine if they agreed with your lifestyle choice? Then you’d be just like them.

[Hidden]
Reply to this topic

More Posts Like This

1

Innocence and Purity of Being

My Fourth and Last Ayahuasca Ceremony I intently concentrated on my intention with a slight sadness in my heart, that this would be my last and final Ayahuasca ceremony in Peru. While meditating I focused on clearing my...

1

Pure Acceptance and Surrender

My third Ayahuasca ceremony represented for me the interconnectedness of all living things and the meeting of the hearts of all beings. While sitting and meditating and concentrating on opening up my heart and completely...

1

The Unfurling of my Heart

My Second Journey with Ayahuasca New Years Eve My intention was to focus on opening up my heart and clearing my mind. Jose sang his beautiful Icaros and initiated the ceremony with Mapacho. I had my larger cup of...

1

My Journey of the Heart

My First Ceremony with Ayahuasca I just want to take some time to shed a little light on my story and my personal journey before I embarked on my journey with Ayahuasca. I have wanted to travel to Peru and South America...

1

I have a guy problem – I really don't like guys.

Hi. I need advice…. I am having a really hard time *liking* guys. I feel like if I make out with a guy more than once if we are drunk or just at a party I tend to have feelings for them, or grow feelings for them,...

5

Your biggest questions in life?

I have many questions I would love to be answered, but it occured to me there are probably tonnes more great questions I haven’t even thought of. What are some of the questions you would like to know the most, or...

1

Do Drugs Change You?

Do drugs change who you are, or do they unlock your inner being? I started out as a very hood drug user who knew everything there is to know about life but then i had my experiences with psychs and now im a peaceful guy...

19

Suggestions for a site-wide HE 30 day challenge?

**I’ve created a poll for the different types of challenges here: http://tally.tl/BEnr2** —- Starting in February, we’re going to have monthly 30-day challenges! We had a very successful challenge years...

6

Any Trip Stories?

I just wanted to make a hot discussion with a lot of replies and i also like sharing and listening to trip stories so if you have one feel free to share it and it might also help people who hasn’t tripped but are...

1

Streamlet of consciousness

blitzed in the early coursing midnight and palsied out, neatly, on the frenetic curb of a five blunt rotation. spliced into reality’s sharp edge. A gyrating universe crank silhouetted askance stilted time tableaus...

1

My Dream Life Infringes on My Real Life!

Hi all! For just a little background info, I have been dreaming my other life for 24 years now. I fall off to sleep and enter into my next life not skipping a beat. I will give you my dream resume: Spring of 1991-Fall of...

2

acid room

Hey guys this is reiko the dragon and I wanted to know about your experiences with acid and I also wanted to know if anything tops acid or comes close to the experience

1

Paying for college is for the experience not the classes.

Hey everyone. So my name is Chris and I actually found this website yesterday. I have been on it non-stop today in between my crazy college schedule. I have found a lot of people who are posting about how bad college is!...

1

Looking for friends ?

I’m Indian, 17, I read a lot, I’m pretty normal I think. Smoke weed sometimes, just looking for cool people to talk to and share worries with. I’m a good listener and have some free time on my hands, so...

1

Street Art

Hey ya’ll. I’ve just gotten started cutting stencils and playing around with shading and blending colors. I’m posting this just to reach out to those of you who are interested in art in general to...