Thoughts while on drugs
So I thought it would be interesting to see what people have realized while they were on drugs. I sometimes write stuff down when I’m under the influence, so I can remember it later when sober, and I bet some of you do the same. I would like you guys to share some of what you have learned, realized, thought of etc. while tripping, high, rolling, whatever it may be. I’ll start with a couple.
*I wrote these down while I was on an 1/8th of shrooms:
We all take this “this is your human body, therefore your life” approach. That’s restricting within itself. I am typing this to communicate with my “self,” or the entity that is my physical body, because that’s how IT (this self, or body) communicates. If it weren’t for the constraints of gravity and my body (what I “know,” and everything the senses make out and thus create) then I wouldn’t be typing this bullshit and I would be existing instead. The distinction between “reality” and what “is” is all how your physical self sees it. *
I remember being completely in my head, and having discovered this realm where literally anything was possible. As time went by I slowly began to come back to my senses (literally) and wrote that, I remember being annoyed at the limitations set by our physical body when there are places “we” (not being our body, i guess haha) can go and literally have a blank slate to create anything with no concept of time.
*When you remove the body, you remove its restraints. This is not dying, but rather a “higher” existence.*
That one seems kind of obvious/understandable, but I was witnessing this and being a part of this “higher existence” (which was unlike anything I’ve ever experienced with my senses).
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Of the 2 times i did shrooms i originally planned to keep a super detailed trip log, but after half an hour I couldn’t be arsed to write in it. Anyway, first time on shrooms I had some interesting views about time, cause I overheard some guys say “..he’ll be there at 5″. this sounded ridiculous to me
“be there at 5″?? What 2D world are you living in, time isn’t just a line, it’s the universe progressing itself.
Also, a bit on the comedown, I played frisbee with my tripmate, and the two tripsitters. However someone threw the frisbee had so much meaning to me, it’s hard to explain
When I took Amanita Muscaria (A type of mushroom, only slightly different from psilocybin in my experience) I realized how pointless stress is in my life. Everything that really needs to be taken care of will be, and I dont have to worry about it, I just have to do it. Ever since then I’ve never been worried, whether I’m getting my ass handed to me by a supervisor, I’m breaking up with a girlfriend, or even when I’m 50 feet up a rock face with no rope and my handholds start to break off. I’ve learned that its probably going to be okay. And if its not, then I’ll just make the best of it.
@bongodeburrito, so true
my first time on shrooms yielded an awesome realization, that all you need to be happy is in the moment. I mean, 99.9% of your suffering and stress is about what is going to happen.
I was just sitting with a good friend at a lake, listening to nature. That’s all you need, really.
A few weeks before I had gone through a lot of shit, got arrested and locked up in isolation for 2 weeks until I was finally released and they dropped charges, and my school kicked me.
I laughed it off
Shrooms seems to be the consensus “thought” drug so far.
For me it was while on shrooms. I ate a quarter of shrooms one night, pretty intense.
I was at the cottage with about 20 of my friends. The cottage was 3 floors and had a backyard that was followed by a forest.
At first I started off with everyone on the top floor, listening to music and hanging out on the patio, until I started feeling something. As everyone knows, the best way to intensify the trip is to wander somewhere you feel comfortable and take it all in.
At that point I wandered off from the party on the top floor and walked down to the bottom floor. Immediately my trip intensified and I found myself in a hallway with closed doors. I felt very uncomfortable and decided to run to the middle floor. I stood there for two minutes trying to decide if it was where I needed to be while tripping, until some girl came down and started yelling at another girl. I was once again very uncomfortable so I ran back to the top floor.
On the top floor, about 15 people were blasting music, drinking and smoking and I couldn’t take it. I felt as if I didn’t belong anywhere in this house, that the house was full of pretentious beings who had no idea who they were and what they were doing.
After contemplating this thought I decided to exit the back door and head towards the forest. I didn’t plan on entering, I just wanted to be outside in the fresh air.
Immediately my mind was at ease. The fresh air felt like a shower of rejuvenation, the smell smelt like life all around me was trying to impress me with their scent. This was all too invigorating to not want to enter the forest, so I did.
I have NEVER felt so comfortable in my life in this forest. Everything seemed so welcoming, bugs, trees, air, animals. Everything was amazing. I felt one with nature, everything was connected. I sat down in between a large tree, in between the branches and leaves. I was getting hugged by this tree, bugs crawled along my arms, the leaves brushing against my hair…I really felt as if I was exactly where I needed to be and everything around me was trying to tell me that.
I spent over an hour in this forest, alone, until my friends came out to smoke…this made the magical forest uncomfortable again, as if most people in this world pollute nature, just by being around it and doing things they don’t realize. Snapping branches, kicking flowers, smoking cigarettes and throwing the lit butt into the grass. All of this hurt me as much as it hurt the forest and I felt it. It was one of the most intense trips I’ve had on shrooms.
Wrote this after a few joints. It tries to be creative at the same time as offering some advice to myself…
Tear up the chains of you past. Burn them up, shine your radiant light of within upon them and abolish them from your soul. Be free of everything but right now. Go forth into each moment light and nimble, as a dear. Be your focus completely and utterly on the present moment in its entirety of beauty, truth; light- its utter existence.. Hear all, touch all, taste all, smell all and see all. Judge not anything, for you are a part of everything as everything is a part of you, just as anything is part of everything, and everything is a part of anything.
Pay no attention to prophesizing or judgemental thoughts of the future. Pay no creedence, in fact, at all to thoughts of the future. As you destroy the chains I the past from your soul, so to shine light on the dark corners of your future, and treat all future as one, infitessimally small, part of your life. You will, no doubt, never leave the present and arrive in the future other than your foolish doings so in your mind. therefore treat the future as a manifestation of your present. Do not steal from the future. Do not play with our childrens time. Do not bargain with it, do not do anything other than grow it. This is our ultimate goal indeed. The future is a result of our actions and state of being. A collective being that cannot be moved with such fluidity as the mind, but at the same time adds untimely stability and security in the situation you face. Seek out this being in your mind, in your body. It is everywhere, it is no god no more than it is simply a word: being. To be. Nurture this state within as a child and give it your utmost love and self-compassion. For this is the true “you”- the best and most radiant “you” within, that creates the most radiant “you” without. A quick and sudden change of situation may be experienced when this fact is embraced. It is simple really: that we should take more care of within, within the realm of consciousness that is, than of what happens without, the outer world and all that makes up a few pixels of our very consciousness
Collectively we can achieve greatness. This has been demonstrated on countless occasions by millions of people. People just like you and me and every single other conscious being on this planet, and yet we act as if we have no power. We learn helplessness, we do not take ultimate responsibility for our task. What is this task? Our task is simply to live our life. There should be no other task other than to live.
@luigiblue, ” that the house was full of pretentious beings who had no idea who they were and what they were doing.”
really familiar thought, a huge aspect of the shroom high is making you able to see things objectively, at least for me it is. Makes you pity the unknowing
Haha yeah dude I have an entire Memo book on my phone filled with ideas that I only wrote in while pretty baked. It’s really cool because its a little bit like a timeline of my ideas so I can see where earlier on I had an idea, then later I expanded and expanded on it until it was much more complex and taught me so much more. I have this one Memo that talks about how ideas are like tunnels and if you can’t continue to dig your tunnel you’ll never grow and that people get stuck on ideas and thats what causes narrow-mindedness, but that you can always go deeper down the tunnel and continue to learn. It’s pretty neat-O Lol.
@wellidotry, I would like to hear them just as much though, because I know exactly where you’re coming from as I have had all those silly stoner thoughts as well, although now my thoughts are usually much more insightful to me.
@caspar, I feel you, I have been through very similar stuff, like the concept of time while tripping. It makes the way people use time every day seem really weird, like you said, because of the whole thought that time is linear.
@luigiblue, That’s really cool dude, that sounds like a worthwhile experience to have. Feeling like all is right is such an incredible feeling, I could only describe it (the way I experience it) as being as content as possible.
@hazee, That’s a sweet analogy, it makes a lot of sense to me. The more energy you put into an idea, in this case through thought, the more it flourishes. That’s a really interesting observation that I think most people know deep down, but are not aware of.
This exact same feeling came over me under the same circumstances (a shrooms trip, if not an eighth then very close). I find it interesting though that this happened to the both of you as well….I also believe psychedelics allow for an objective look not only at oneself but at a situation, when I was at a party, I also felt like the people there were just playing out a played-out ritual with no clue how to get off the merry-go-round or that they were even on one. It really bothered me that we place so much value on simply milling around a small space drinking alcohol, wasting away the best and healthiest years of our lives, and not trying to do something big or at least different, like the old saying “those who do not learn from history are doomed to repeat it.” I felt like our only success was in becoming walking, talking cliches, I felt like all I had become was a Slater-like character (from Dazed and Confused) and was massively disappointed in myself. I think we can safely say shrooms are not a party drug!
I had a nice little tidbit I wrote while coming down from the day:
We are all given a measure of life to spend as we enter the world,
With this life, we can do anything we choose.
Why then, should it be, that anyone chooses less than total exhaustion?
There are those who guard it, afraid to release it back from where it once came
There are those who mimic it, attempting to defraud its nature and hold hostage the real
There are those who ween it, cutting “loses” as much as possible, and fearing exploration of it
There are those who waste it, misunderstanding the power and misdirecting the force
There are those who abuse it, mindlessly flinging their energies into areas void of natural retention
And there are those who love it,
Who seek only to use all they were given,
In a way that denotes the grandeur of such a gift.
There are those that understand what it is to live,
And it is this feeling of connection that our souls yearn for.
I’m not sure how I feel about it, but I think I had something going on there…@dylmill
“when I was at a party, I also felt like the people there were just playing out a played-out ritual with no clue how to get off the merry-go-round or that they were even on one.”
So much yes. I was coming down on some Lucy and tried to go to a party afterwards…I ended up staying outside because I was just so completely and TOTALLY disinterested in trying to be a party of that monstrous machine. I got so uncomfortable and I am usually quite good at not being that way…but in the moment, I lost it. I held the wall up for a good half hour, waiting to leave.
I have like 60 composition books in my closet filled from page to page with writings, pictures, and poems I’ve made when I’m tripping.
Heres a piece from 87′ when I was high on peyote at an airport in Cali,
These planes, lifting thousands of people all over the world are the epitome of modern creation, space ships may seem amazing, but they are still a budding technology, we have mastered our planet with these metal birds, we can kill with them, deliver food with them, and travel to any conceivable location on earth with them, they are, in a word, amazing.
@lytning91, “I ended up staying outside because I was just so completely and TOTALLY disinterested in trying to be a party of that monstrous machine”
I know right? It’s crazy, I felt like the party, though it is supposed to be a celebration, though it’s supposed to make us feel good, was just another system, another hierarchy. It made me sad/angry that even in our fun, we create these systems almost as if we can’t help ourselves. What I was hearing was probably hallucinations but it seemed like people were just constantly comparing themselves to one another (jobs, money, status, etc.) and I felt like I could sense through to each of their cores and see their inner ugliness, the savages we are underneath our clothes (metaphorically). It was like some twisted version of Spider-sense, very scary, disappointing, and I too wanted no part of it. I just wanted to run away, but it was freezing out and I was nowhere near anything familiar, nevermind the drugs. Sometimes I wonder, I could be right, but maybe I’m just nuts. Rethinking this makes me consider the possibility that the ugliness I sensed was just my own projected outwards on the people, and that I just need to lighten up. I really don’t know, but what I do know is that next time I trip I want to do so either with a very small amount of people to make sure I don’t get into trouble, or better yet, alone.
@lytning91, That’s really interesting, I’m trying to understand it better. I can see different personality types/phases in the “people who guard it, ween it, abuse it, waste it etc.” I would also think that many people go through several of these phases before eventually being one of the people who “loves it.” I could also see many people getting stuck in one of those “phases” and never becoming a person who “loves” their life. But without all the different misuse (not exactly the right word) of the measure of life each gets to spend in this world, it would be difficult to learn to love life without going through other “phases” first, simply to realize that we have not been living life to its fullest. I’m kind of going around in circles here, Ima think about your statement some more.
Also, I’ve thought about the exhaustion thing before, and I can only think that some people choose to exhaust themselves on things and ideas and activities, but when one becomes “connected” there is no place for exhaustion because there is always boundless energy flowing through you. There is much less effort required to live your life, as you are taken on a perfect journey and you just coast, observing and experiencing all the magnificence without having to search for it.
@theskafish, It’s hard to know exactly where the lines are drawn with experiences on hallucinogens imo. For me, it was like the “HEY, how are!?” crap was revolting. I ran into all of these people that just wanted to be so shallow and monotonous…it was bearable and I just got really frustrated. I let someone else drive me because I was trying to be responsible, but I would have left instantly after arriving had I driven myself there.
I mean, I don’t really know what to think of the projection or hyper-awareness part…I know that my great experiences were based on me feeling really close to my friends. I feel closer to the people I see awesome in and I feel distance and disgust for those who I perceive shallow, emptiness in. In that sense I really do think it just extends my views further, but with your hearing them all talk about comparing themselves to everyone and talking about their shells and masks…I think that was very real. We are so programed to bypass a concern for that way of being, so to have the psilo in you peel back your tolerance…you being to realize just how much you hate that aspect of existence.
@thomaschong, By saying that you were high on peyote at an airport, I’m going to assume that you have been to many places under the influence of something that most drug users can not say they have been. That would give you a different perspective on so many things, rather than just observing surroundings that one is already familiar with (which often happens when one is tripping). That’s really cool. I bet being high on an airplane would yield some pretty interesting insights. Do you still feel that same way about airplanes, with 20+ years of progression in technology?
Whenever I’m high on marijuana or mushrooms I always get these insights that seem to come to me. I write all of them down. Here’s a few:
“We are the cells inside this universal organ that consists of an infinitely large organ system.”
“You know why I think yoga works? It’s going back to how we should all live, our natural state. All animals stretch, sit in silence, and observe. This is what we are starting to do, going back to our natural state.”
“When you age, there is still always that same “you”, that pure consciousness you have, that is synching up with this three-dimensional biological device.”
“The key is to merge the collective/one consciousness. The gateway is the internet. We need to start communicating with strangers.”
“The observer is observing consciousness collapsing subatomic particles (matter) from the infinite possibility of the future into the present moment. The observer is possibly the spirit some speak of, watching this what seems to be holographic universe occur for a temporary amount of time.”
This next one I think I was sober but just finished meditating for an hour or so.
“Everything is connected. The only way it becomes separate is our brain which distinguishes a chair, being a chair, and a pair of shirts being a collective pair of shirts. Without the brain, everything is one in the same, geometric patterns. Two shirts become one, everything becomes one, including you.”
“Consciousness is non-local, just like quantum particles. Everything is quantum particles in a sense, therefore I am non-local and also have a wave form. When in wave form, particles are in every position possible, they are everywhere and everything. I am made up of these, therefore, I am everything, and so are you.”
The most important things I’ve taken out of shrooms have not been so much thoughts or ideas, but emotions. Emotional reactions to concepts. I wept for myself about a time earlier in the week where I had become so worried, scared, and angry that I practically locked my mind out from all avenues to positivity. I’ve never felt such motherly love for myself as in that instance. After that I peaked so hard that I started understanding the intrinsic nature of cool, and what it means to be hip to the vibe while remaining a totally unique expression.
Another time, I saw from my deck a poorly dressed older man walking, swinging his arms in a pseudo masculine manner. Your stereotypical ignoramus and pervert by appearance. I looked down at my own body and had a sharp emotional reaction to the concept of having sex with a woman I don’t love for the sake of some mental urge. The ugliness of that compared to the transcendent bliss of true lovers circulating their love between each other. It was a very alien emotion to say the least but since then my stance towards sex and relationships has been changing.
The hardest I’ve ever peaked, my second time doing psychedelics, 4g ground up, alone with myself in my apt. I was writing from what seemed like something other than my own hand. I scrawled, The spirit of art is an earnest one. The spirit of the human is an earnest one. I go on for pages in wild hand writing trying to convince the reader that the answer to all human dilemma is human expression, in a manner intended to help me enter this understanding in a sober mindstate. It’s some pretty crazy shit. I came out and said, ‘polarities are our way of proving it doesn’t exist’. Wrongly proving ourselves don’t exist, the avenue to mechanistic nihilistic worldview. I really wanted to stress the transcendent nature of the self is what I was doing I guess. It’s all pretty hard for me to comprehend since I was in basically a perfectly alert, meditative, contemplative state at the time. And now it’s 8 months later and i’m hungover, in my underwear hanging my neck typing into my phone.
Tl;dr, don’t do drugs
great story! I wrote a letter to my ex girlfriend from 5 years back, totally out of the blue got no idea what made me think of her i even saved the letter
Before you read this extremely long conversation I would like you to know you are absolutely entitled to discard it and ignore it, for 1. I have been up for 24 hours and have had a sudden level of adrenaline not seen before 2. I may or may not be sober at the time of the letter but I must also warn you that this is not any type of attempt to being dodgy (apologies if it seems so) If i tell you i regret sending you this letter when i’ve had some decent sleep please try to see the comedial value of it and not be like Justin Is fuckin CrazyWEAT$#T ( btw im failing english dont be suprrise by how this is going down)
I would like you to know that you are a wonderful person, no dont worry im not hitting on you not saying i wouldn’t hit on you now I am simply stating from what I recall of our lovely relationship you were a cool person and I hope your just as cool you use to be not saying I would be disapointed of your not or that my judgement is right or wrong at all. I would like you to know that the actual reason of this letter was cause i’ve decided some significant changes to my life which h based upon yourself as a entity indirectly. I assume everyone would like to hear about the positive externalities one has made on one’s life.
Please don’t make your mind wander that has prompted me to write this message……………..