What kind of sexual things do you like? I am trying to get a better idea of sex interests. From the littlest look to the actual penetration. What really gets people going? I would like some ideas about how to get into the mood both by being pleasured and pleasuring. I would love any tips I can get! I think its healthy to hear what other people have to say and then possibly apply it to your own sex life!
Also dislikes. Anything that really turns you off? Things I should possibly stay away from. I am not new to sex or anything, but i always am looking to improve performance and letting my partner know what I like! So tell me what works best for you!
Thats how my partner feels. What is it about blowjobs that are better? Is it a mind thing or a physical thing or both? It makes me feel like he doesn’t want me when would rather get head. Do you think that this probably isnt the case? I guess I feel like he is saying I am bad in bed when he wants other things more?
@Emily, if you concentrate on what’s better and what’s not, you’re only going to say what’s important for you. Not for your partner. But he’ll agree with me. I am sorry to kill such a nice perverse discussion where everyone could say how awesome a blowjob is, but at least you’ll get to know all the people in the world.
No one ever generalized that blowjobs are better.
Your partner has dedications. You are part of them. Extremely normal.
Have fun and don’t think about it too much. :)
@ Bryan Hellard, HAHA! Thats what I have been told. But idk, you believe it less when its the person trying to make you feel better about it. It makes sense and all, but I guess since I like sex better than him going down on me that he should feel the same about head. Because penises dont have tongues either but I love sex way more. But I guess thats just one of the many ways woman and men can differ. lol
Are you doing that 30 no spankin challenge thing?
@ Sasho Stoyanov, I do have the problem of over thinking things. But I dont think I am focusing on myself. Sex takes two people, and I think about what is important for him as best I can. If I came off as only trying to please myself, than I came off wrong. lol I am looking for any tips, especially the ones about turning him on. thats why I said “I would like some ideas about how to get into the mood both by being pleasured and pleasuring.” I just want any tips on anything sexual! lol basically thats what it boils down to. :)
Lately, that has been the best option. Just trying to let my instincts take over. But I over think things and it feels impossible at times and then I end up not enjoying it like I should be. I am way crazier than him when it comes to sexuality and I think this is part of why we have problems. I feel like there should be wayyy more than what he tells me he likes. lol it seems to… simple. and what do you mean by “Tell him that if you want to kill your game. :)”
@Emily Yup, but I’ll join in any ways. I like sex, blow jobs, and hanb jobs. It’s all good, they all have they’re pros and cons. I would agree though, that sex is the best.
You asked for detail, so I’ll just start spilling. Either I’ll get embarassed or bored, and then I’ll stop xD I feel like I may feel a little guilty if I start spilling, because I may share some things about my girlfriend as well….. But no body knows who she is! (this would be an odd time for one of my friends to appear on this site…..)
Lets start by pros and cons of everything!
– Some moves are better then what I can do for myself
– Good for finishing
– Nice way to get things started
– Hand jobs are also good when they are not always going to go for orgasm, I always like to fondle my girl when we’re cuddling together, say watching tv or something, it’s just something to do with my hands xD I like it when she does the same to me. Just some stroking and rubbing, gentle stuff.
– Tongues = winners.
– No finishing :(
– The positions are endless
– I like girl on top best, I actually have more control that way :P and can choose to relinquish that control whenever (if only it was taken from me….)
– Can kiss during
– Gives some of the best full body orgasms
– warmth of bodies pressing together is excellent
– Cons…. clean up after (dealing with condom and stuff)
– Feels bad when I finish first and then go soft before she can finish (doesn’t happen often, but when it does….. feelsbadman. Most often caused by too much hand job or blow job foreplay xD Getting too close to the edge before even beginning.)
And, some general things that I wish my girl did/could do (these are all just fantasys, not sure if they’d even be as good as I imagine. But I wanna try them!)
More “surprise” sexualness. Random sexual acts! Things like quickies, less foreplay (on minute you’re watching talking, or watching tv, next minute a girl is naked on top of you), more spontanaity…
More aggressiveness! Yes sex can be gentle and tender, but it can also involve throwing each other on the bed.
I’ve heard amazing things can happen with PC muscles and vaginas….
And I’ve always loved strip teases and dances :D She does do them, and its awesome, but the more the merrier! I love looking at my girl, she’s pretty damn sexy.
@ Bryan, Thats some good advice! Thanks! And its sweet that you think your girl is sexy. :) But I got all confused when you said hand jobs were a way to finish and blowjobs weren’t? I thought most girls let a guy finish through blowjobs? Also I agree with the girl on top thing. Thats probably the best because you both have the option of doing the work. I always try to do surprises and I play them out in my head but they never come out the way I think they will! lol O well… I will keep trying!
@ Emily No swallowing/no finishing in mouth.
Also, surprise morning sex! I’ve been woken up with kisses before, but being woken up with a blowjob could be even better. Or being woken up in the midst of being mounted…… Put that morning wood to use xD
Uh thats what I am saying. I thought most girls swallow? Lmao now I kinda feel like a slut?
I always want to wake him up to something like that but he works, so I never really can and on weekends he wakes up before me. So Maybe this time Ill just try to get up extra early for him! lol
Wanting to improve your sex life is ok but worrying about it is not sexy at all. Personally, I found out that I don’t need any books or to ask anybody about my intimate life, all I need is to see my boyfriend and let my body finish all the crazy nice ideas that have rushed into my head. @ Emily, you have everything you need, girl, it’s natural that your boyfriend will get annoyed because he probably sees that you are trying too hard and that’s just killjoy.
@Ellie, I see what you are saying and thankfully, I have started to realize this. I doo try to hard. WAY to hard. And I know I definitely dont think its sexy when someone does that so I know it must be a turnoff for him as well. Hopefully I can just let go and not think one day, i am slowly getting there!
COMMUNICATION!!! It’s practically the key to success in any exchange. Clear communication and release of inhibitions. If you trust and care for your partner, you won’t be embarrassed to ask them what they want, how they want it and when. The key is to have these discussions when sex is not an option. People are more inclined to speak openly when they believe that the conversation is more hypothetical than potential. Bring it up with your mate when you’re far away from decent mattress, or sofa, or kitchen, or balcony, or public restroom because we’ll do it anywhere.
When you’re in a safe zone, you won’t have to worry about having to immediately walk what you talk. That can be a lot of pressure. It’s like promising the coach the championship right before kick-off. Such talk is usually initiated far from the field so as to guage one another’s committment and also to allow time to process and organize.
Make it fun. Find out what he wants and give it to him a little at a time in exchange for somethings you like (99% of which he will do with no hesitation.) Every now and then, surprise him and just completely let go of all inhibitions and do anything and everything. Find out what works and what was a bad idea. Continue what works and fix whatever was bad until IT WORKS too.
-Scratching, clawing. When a girl has long fingernails and runs them across my back or chest, gently or violently are both nice, or even burying them in my skin.
-Teasing. No elaboration needed.
-Going down, especially if the girl pulls my hair or straddles my face.
-I love throwing the girl around on the bed, bending her into various positions, pulling her hair, spanking her, and so on.
-Another thing that drives me (and most guys) really wild is anal. Doing a girl up the rear end is such an incredible feeling, especially if the girl is really into it too.
-A girl who will spontaneously initiate sex, who is open about what turns her on, who doesn’t hold back, who isn’t afraid of getting dominant sometimes, who takes what she wants, who acts out her fetishes, who’s proud of her sexuality, and who can go for hours. This drives me wilder than a wildebeest.
-Bad blowjobs. Teeth, not enough saliva, not enough suction, not enough immersion. Suck hard, use plenty of saliva, keep those teeth out of the way and do it all fully.
-Holding back. There is no bigger disappointment than a girl who can’t relax, let go and act on her desires in bed.
-Dead fish syndrome. Don’t just lay there, do something.
-Lack of variation/creativity. Don’t be a robot, whatever you’re doing, mix it up a bit. Repetitiveness is booooooring.